alarm clock

get woken up by it stay in bed for an hour realize the infinite you've gotten yourself into

i got woken up by my alarm clock

I'm gonna now kill myself

by Ol'banana December 6, 2021

scottish alarm clock

When you wake up before your partner and you give them head till they wake up.

My wife was asleep till I performed the Scottish alarm clock on her.

by Sandolorian December 12, 2021

Dirty alarm clock

A woman standing over an alarm clock primed for 3:00AM while giving a blowjob and either cums or pisses on the alarm clock before the alarm goes off

"yo, once we went to my place we tried doin a " dirty alarm clock."

by Nnotbad March 29, 2022

French Alarm Clock

The Act of preforming oral sex on your partner, so as to wake them from sleeping

"the morning after we hooked up, Stacy gave me a French Alarm Clock."

by Alejandro Cabello September 5, 2021

Ghetto alarm clock

When you sleep through your alarms and your friends come over to wake you up by banging on your bedroom window.

"Austin's phone died last night, but the ghetto alarm clock woke him up."

by Nathan V. September 26, 2021

Westminster Alarm Clock

A sexual act closely related to a handjob. The receiver positions themselves so his phallus is accessible. At precisely the top of the hour, a partner grasps the receiver’s phallus and yanks on it with the force equivalent to the bell-ringers at Big Ben. This is succeeded by a shriek of either happiness or pain from the receiver. The amount of tugs depends on the time at the top of the hour. Dubbed “The Westminster Alarm Clock” due to Hugh Lupus Grosvenor, the Duke of Westminster, having the act performed on him prior to the construction of Big Ben. Disgruntled neighbors typically awoke to 8 loud evenly spaced shrieks each morning.

Gina: What time is it?
Colin: Noon. Why?
Gina: No reason…
Colin: AH! AH! AH! AH! AH! AH! AH! AH! AH! AH! AH! AH!
Charlie: Sounds like Colin is getting one hell of a Westminster Alarm Clock. Oh shit! It’s noon! I’m gonna be late for that lunch date!

by TESTICLETWISTER October 13, 2024

Colombian Alarm Clock

When you drink yourself silly, meet a local for the night and be woke up in the morning by her yelling “baby baby baby” pointing at the shit mess you made while passed out. Literally shit the bed.

Austin: I woke early thanks to the Colombian Alarm Clock!

Matt: yo that’s so gross! Funny but gross!

by Arb Guy December 10, 2024