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Fat Git

The Legend Of The Fat Git:
An enormous man who weighs 500 stone and has the combined body fat of 50 sumo wrestlers. He is rumoured to travel around the Scottish Highlands searching for something to shit on. A startled farmer in Scotland once found a pile of shit as big as the Ritz Carlton (see quote below) and he instantly knew it was the Fat Git's doing.
In the summer of 1982 seventeen distilleries were emptied by the Fat Git. He obviously has a taste for lager and chicken vindaloo.
Here's what to do if you meet the Fat Git:
1) (If he gets too close) try and hide yourself in his 60 folds of fat until he goes to sleep. You'll have plenty of leftover chicken curries to stay alive on.
2) Throw rocks at his fat and watch them rebound at great speeds. (It's good fun!)
3) Ask him what's the biggest shit he's ever produced. He'll bend over and show you.
4) Do not ask to smell his armpits.
"I saw the Fat Git's shit outside my house... it was the size of the Ritz Carlton but without all the windows! Large chunks were falling all over the place killing innocent sheep in the process."
by Fat Git Eye Witness September 12, 2005
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fat cat

Greedy, bottom line business person who exploits people and the economy for vested interests.
Damn that fat cat Mitt Romney. He'll destroy the country, and the world.
by whoamireallyyyy July 31, 2012
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Fat Second

a term used to describe not seeing someone for 3 months. As seen in new york state when someone is in possession of 25 g to 2 oz of marijuana, they are sentenced to three months in jail. Typically occuring so often, it feels more like a fat second rather than the three months.
"Yo I haven't seen you in a long time, where have you been?"

"It hasn't been that long. I got caught riding dirty with 2 oz. and got put away for like a fat second."
by hayhayandgraham July 15, 2009
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fat tard

an overweight or obese and mentally handicapped person.
look at jake over there eating all those donuts like a fat tard
by digeratiX January 5, 2010
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fat yeti

when a man is unable to find the vagina on an extremely fat woman, and in his frustration and urgency, begins to fuck her fat folds in substitution. he commonly will aim for the stomach, sometimes entering the bellybutton. the woman is usually hairy, which give the man the sensation similar to that of fucking a yeti.
Thomas was so drunk last night, he got desperate and gave Tara a fat yeti.
by go fuck yo' self December 7, 2009
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Fat-fall

When a fat person falls down onto a couch instead of gently easing them self onto it because their legs can't support their weight on the way down.
Your grandfather just fat-falled onto the couch and broke it.
by shizzamz5 October 9, 2010
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Fat Shut-In

A person so overweight they stay inside all day long. Usually due to crippling depression brought on by morbid obesity and/or ugliness.
Person 1: Some chick bought my movie collection but she doesn't drive and sent her kid over to pick them up.

Person 2: Yeah, she's probably a fat shut-in.
by William J J T October 30, 2010
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