Creasant wank

The art of arranging your 5 favourite porn mags open at your favourite pages into an arc in front of you giving you a 180 degree visual feast to focus on whilst polishing ones trumpet
Sadly becoming more seldom practiced with the advent of on -line rhythm stimulation using tablets and computers
“Can’t wait for the mrs to go out to the bingo later

I’m backing up that much I’m gonna have me a creasant wank
by Lord loverocket October 10, 2018
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wank and stank

It's a special move that activates, when you are masturbating and the same moment, the jizz shoots out, you fart, so it bacomes a magical moment, in that everything is released from your body and you go into transcendence
Bob: Y'know Billy, yesterday was great!
Billy: Why?
Bob: I had a wank and stank, it shot me into stratosphere.
Billy: Wow, I've heared about it, but I thought that were only legends!
by SlamWeasel May 04, 2018
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brain-wanking

Act of spending one's time with very complicated theoretical problems which, when solved, do not serve for anything useful or practical.
J: Did you understand the sense of the problem in theoretical quantum mechanics which we solved in our course today?
P: It was just some brain-wanking. It does not have any practical meaning.
by xxteapot November 30, 2011
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Wank Love

Wank Love is when you still like the idea of them/it even after a wank

DISCLAIMER: always have a wank before u ever do anything risky!!
Person1: I think i like her
Person2: but do u love her
Person1: yes frank i think i do
Person2: good job fella
*person1 marries his love*
*person1 goes through a horrible divorce*
Frank: maybe if u had checked she was your wank love ude be fine right now
by Shmuckboy12 April 19, 2020
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wank-a-lank

When something is very very bad, or wank.

Ben: Ah mate, i well have to work sunday.

Biz: Thats fucking wank-a-lank mate.
by BizBiz December 17, 2006
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Mis-wank

Jerking off to something you thought was sexy but turns out to be something gross.
i had mis-wanked earlier to the sounds of my poor neighbor who had fallen and was yelling for help, and NOT to the sounds of some sexy new neighbor lady getting bent over her couch in the apartment above mine. my hearing has really diminished over the years.
by T-monks February 23, 2016
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Crouch Wank

When you receive an unsolicited video of someone crouched down, so low you can see their goofy, in front of a mirror jerking it and blowing their load on said mirror.
Omg I just got a crouch wank from Louis on snap!!
by JamesBr November 30, 2023
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