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computer

That addicting little box you're sitting in front of
*twitch* I've got to get on my computer. I haven't been on for 20 minutes. *twitch*
by Gemini Twin #2 December 28, 2005
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Computer Virus

1.) Any program on your computer that reproduces its code
2.) Any program on your computer that completely fucks it up and disables its ability to work properly
3.) A said program that you probably got when you opened an e-mail you didn't know who it was from or downloaded something that you didn't know what it was
4.) Windows
Person 1: My computer keeps crashing, I think it has a virus.
Person 2: Did you open any emails you recieved from a stranger?
1: No.
2: Did you download any strange files?
1: No.
2: Are you running Windows?
1: Yes.
by Definition DemonX October 9, 2004
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computer

The reason I can't enjoy my weekends anymore. The almighty consumer of time. This machine will eat your soul and sell the last few bits on eBay.
What? Explorer froze on my computer's process manager? I'll just end and then start the process again. (desktop crashes)
by Anonymous 3.00 BETA February 21, 2009
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competence porn

Competence porn is a plot with a type of character who is insanely good at something - usually involving some plot-twisting plans.

Coined by Reddit user Rabbithen.
Some of the main characters in shows like: Breaking Bad, Sherlock, Code Geass, Death Note, Dexter, Mad Men, Doctor House, House of Cards, White Collar, Prison Break, Limitless, Big Love, Hannibal, The Bourne Identity, Jack Reacher

provide you with competence porn.
by charlemagne March 5, 2014
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Dell Computers

Piece of shit computers. I can shit computers better than those. Theses unsuspecting people see the ads of the stupid little pot head screamin DUDE UR GETTIN A DELL and get drawn to it. They shit the bed after like 4 months than u call there high quality support and stay on the phone with some dickhead hoo rambles for 4 hours about the wrong thig
Johnny: Watta u doin?
Jimmy: Im playin on my four month old dell.
CRASH
Johnny: Dude ur computer jus crashed.
Jimmy: No prob ill call their great support.
4 hous later......
Support man: CHING CHONG CHO ME CHIN LALALALALALA
Jimmy: Fuck u im getting a Compaq
by Carlos September 24, 2004
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computergasm

Orgasmic behavior caused by extreme delight with some aspect of a computer.
She had a computergasm when she saw a picture of her kitty on her new 24 inch widescreen monitor.
by Crawford Best February 18, 2008
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Computerologist

One who fixes computer systems.
Aww man!My computer is crashing.Can you fix it?
No man! Do I look like a freaking computerologist to you?!
by janets February 24, 2010
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