The worst pet ever. They steal stuff and hide it. They chew the buttons off remote controls. They're impossible to litter train so they shit and piss wherever they want, including right in the middle of the floor for you to step in. If they're in their cage and want out they bite the bars and make tons of noise so you have to flick them in the head to make them shut the fuck up. Then they make this horrible squealing noise when you flick them. They're crepuscular, which means they wake up at 4 am and get into shit and make noise and wake me up. They smell like something thats been dead for two years unless you get them descented and then they smell like something thats been dead for two weeks. They take a shit every twenty minutes that smells disgusting. Dont buy a ferret whatever you do they suck major balls.
Guy who wants a ferret: I want to buy a ferret what do you think?
Me: Goddamn dude I have two of them and I cant wait until they die. You can have mine
Me: Goddamn dude I have two of them and I cant wait until they die. You can have mine
by ???s upon ???s March 31, 2010
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I logged onto chatroulette the other day as a joke and saw some dude stroking his portuguese ferret.
by horticultureRAWKS March 4, 2010
Get the Portuguese Ferret mug.In a failed attempt to censor the word "Pedo", iFunny created a new word for pedophiles, ferretphiles or ferrets.
"Ferretphiles are disgusting"
"Danny is a ferret? Nasty."
"Did you hear that our neighbor is a Ferretphile?"
"Danny is a ferret? Nasty."
"Did you hear that our neighbor is a Ferretphile?"
by tobiistobi October 13, 2020
Get the Ferret mug.by roxmick March 16, 2021
Get the Ferret mug.A person with erratic, up and down behaviour. Has a tendency to ruin the atmosphere with awkwardness or drama. An absolute catastrophe when drunk. An over thinker. Usually suffers from some form of anxiety, OCD, paranoia and self sabotage.
Created by @driven.to.happiness
Created by @driven.to.happiness
"I was thinking about asking Nat out on a date tomorrow" - "Nah I wouldn't bother mate she's a proper issue ferret."
"Sorry for being such an issue ferret last night, I'll replace the glass I smashed in that lads face"
"Sorry for being such an issue ferret last night, I'll replace the glass I smashed in that lads face"
by Driven.to.happiness October 7, 2017
Get the Issue Ferret mug."My cocks pure stinkin! I Shagged Sonia up her shitpipe last night, and got meself a Chutney Ferret!"
by The Phantom Shitter June 14, 2018
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