Wood

Short for “Hollywood” (aka Massive Cocaine Line)

That man’s rippin an absolute wood!!!!!!

by YouWood January 7, 2023

woods

my favorite person in the world.

omg woods i missed you

by wdymyoudontknowmehaha January 11, 2023

chop wood carry water

Chop Wood Carry Water means to do the things you need to do to achieve your aim. Hardwork, labour, persistent all muffled together over a long period of time, will result into goals achieved. It's the name of a book tho.

Chop Wood Carry Water man. It's not going to get any easier.

by Brainydaps January 13, 2023

Woods

A leaf of tobacco to roll weed in to make a blunt.

i.e backwoods

Aye, I’ll be right back. I’m bout to go to the store for some woods.

by 722moe January 13, 2023

Woods

The leaf from tobacco to roll your weed in to make a blunt. This slang is used in Detroit
i.e backwoods

Aye, I’ll be right back I’m finna go to the store to get some woods.

by 722moe January 13, 2023

War of the Woods

Football, Basketball, or Baseball games played between the rivalry of “The Woodlands High School” and “The Woodlands College Park” for the reigning title of the superior Woodlands Highschool.

“Are you going to the Woodforest stadium for the war of the woods? College Park is starting mugshot mickey”

by Likelyjuice July 14, 2023

Wood

Yeah, this is going to be dope. I might do like a Samson one next.

*WHCH!*

Jesus "Ow."

*WHCH!*

Jesus "Ow. "

Guard "Alright now... Carry the wood."

Jesus "Okie dokie. OOF! That feels WAY heavier than I thought it would! It's weird being on the other side of it...."

Guard "Go!"

Jesus "Yeah, no I didn't make these meat Gundams very well..."

*Crowd clamoring in the background*

Father 😨 "What in the fuck is happening right now...?"

Crowd "Kill Jesus! Meh!"

Father "You KNOW he didn't do anything!"

Jesus "Ope... Going down... *THUD!*"

Guard "You there! What's your name?"

Father "Huh? Uh.... Simon? Simon of Cyrene."

Guard "Help him carry the thing. Help him carry the wood."

Father "Do you know even who you're talking to right... You know what? Whatever"

*Lifts wood*

Jesus "Hey *Father*! Er, oh... Heheheh."

Father "Yeahyeah, very funny."

Jesus "I think so. Yeah."

Father *exasperated sigh*

Jesus "I don't think that guard likes me very much."

Father "Yeah... I think I'm going to burn him alive later..."

Jesus "Heheheh."

Father "Tsk! This is dumb. Why are you doing this?"

Jesus "Yeah... I don't know.... What else is there to do?"

Father 😧 "Um... I don't know, I guess. I don't like this..."

Jesus "Hey, not too late to save me."

Father "From what!?"

Jesus "Heh... Alright. Here we are."

Guard "Alright. Move along."

Father 😡 *Disgruntled mumbling* "Gonna move that fucking flesh along... Right offa that fucking skeleton of yours..." 😤

Guard "Alright. Let's nail him to the wood and get out of here."

*Hammering noises*

Jesus "Ow."

Guard *Stabs Jesus and walks away*

Jesus "Hey! Ouch! That is sharp...."

Dismas "Oh Lord! Please! Please forgive me!"

Jesus "Ok."

Gestas "Hey, why don't you just use your God magic, huh?"

Jesus "Ok."

Crow *Lands next to Gestas*

Gestas "AAAAAH! AAAH! MY EYES! AAAAAARRGH!!!"

Jesus "Heheheh... This is fun. You guys are fun... Hey... I'm getting cold... This... This feels weird... *Father*! Why have you forsaken me!? Heheheh..."

Father *Disgruntled groan* "GodIhateyousomuchrightnow..."

by Hym Iam August 11, 2023