Definition:
A caffeine-powered computer whisperer who walks the line between genius and glitch. Damian “Long Shlong” Wood isn’t just a man—he’s a chaotic event wearing human skin. He speaks fluent binary, communes with frogs for wisdom, and believes any disaster can be solved if you just Megazord it.
Profile:
Tech Wizard: Fixes computers by glaring at them until the motherboard apologizes. Once coded a working game using only a keyboard missing the “E.”
Frog Lore Scholar: Claims frogs hold the Wi-Fi password of the universe—and somehow everyone believes him.
Megazord Philosopher: His life motto: “When it’s broken, just Megazord it.” Nobody knows what that means, yet it always works.
Professional Gooner: Operates on pure focus and unholy energy; rumored to have transcended sleep during a 72-hour code-and-Red Bull marathon.
Personality:
Chaotically evil in the most helpful way possible. He’ll repair your router, but it’ll play frog croaks on startup afterward. The man radiates the aura of an overclocked raccoon who discovered enlightenment and decided to major in IT.
Legacy:
Some say he was born when a lightning bolt struck a USB hub; others think he’s a firmware update that gained consciousness. Either way, Damian “Long Shlong” Wood remains a walking reminder that science, chaos, and frog memes can coexist.
A caffeine-powered computer whisperer who walks the line between genius and glitch. Damian “Long Shlong” Wood isn’t just a man—he’s a chaotic event wearing human skin. He speaks fluent binary, communes with frogs for wisdom, and believes any disaster can be solved if you just Megazord it.
Profile:
Tech Wizard: Fixes computers by glaring at them until the motherboard apologizes. Once coded a working game using only a keyboard missing the “E.”
Frog Lore Scholar: Claims frogs hold the Wi-Fi password of the universe—and somehow everyone believes him.
Megazord Philosopher: His life motto: “When it’s broken, just Megazord it.” Nobody knows what that means, yet it always works.
Professional Gooner: Operates on pure focus and unholy energy; rumored to have transcended sleep during a 72-hour code-and-Red Bull marathon.
Personality:
Chaotically evil in the most helpful way possible. He’ll repair your router, but it’ll play frog croaks on startup afterward. The man radiates the aura of an overclocked raccoon who discovered enlightenment and decided to major in IT.
Legacy:
Some say he was born when a lightning bolt struck a USB hub; others think he’s a firmware update that gained consciousness. Either way, Damian “Long Shlong” Wood remains a walking reminder that science, chaos, and frog memes can coexist.
by geggregmed October 16, 2025
Get the Damian "long shlong" Woodmug. Logan woods is a pretty amazing shy sweet guy. You will never be able to explain how you feel about him, to anyone. He probably doesn't know how you feel about him yet, don't be afraid to tell him! He sends mixed messages and isn't ever sure of his feelings. One day he will be wanting to be with you then one day he's with another girl. Logan woods will always want to know where you are and what your doing, he is a very sweet protective guy. He is very easy going and relaxed when it comes to heated situations. DONT BE A BITCH. He wIll act laid back but is still sensitive and will be hurt.
Me: Logan woods is shy but very confident!
Friend: do you know him?
Me: of course I do.
Friend: I cant believe it, he's so amazing.
Friend: do you know him?
Me: of course I do.
Friend: I cant believe it, he's so amazing.
by Yupyupyupyup February 15, 2015
Get the logan woodsmug. Those creepy figurines in your grandparent's apartment that they've collected from God knows where in Africa.
by Nobody10012992 March 3, 2017
Get the wood peoplemug. Contrary to popular believe (see: ala mode), the Wood wide web's nonsensical capitalization structure is purpose built for it's own rationale. You see that the wood can be utilized, speaks to human's ownership of the domain of Earth. The wideness of this expanse, speaks to the spooky incantation which follows it. That is to say, we have not uncovered all rocks, harvested all grain, plowed and fertilized all soil. And, while this may be scary in that Brown Recluse Spiders are all around us, wanting to murder us for our existent nature--they mostly love in the woods, protecting their own webs. . ."mostly"
Eric Cartman is a proud user of the Www to. . .uh justify bully in the Wood wide web. Like a comment bullying a bully--which in this case, the thought completes itself. (I.e. : "I have evidence, and I'll use it!" )
by BestEgo November 17, 2023
Get the Wood wide webmug. by Car Wash Man March 11, 2021
Get the Snuggle Woodmug. Term for masterbation
by anonymous June 9, 2024
Get the Chucking woodmug. The shittiest public school in Guelph, this ass school has wannabe gangsters and simps who sucks each others dicks, this school is home to the gays with multiple different types of species, the white people here are deadly and all the brown people are white washed and faggots (except the Punjab's)
by TheBigBoyWest July 21, 2025
Get the Westminister Woods PSmug.