purple headed christian meat missile

n. See also Penis
n. The monster lurking within a Christian male's pants, waiting to attack his lover's meat wallet or cum dumpster.
n. Term first used on a popular South Florida talk show, by regular caller Archie.

"Dude, I gave her all of my purple headed christian meat missile last night."
"No shit!"
"Yeah, her fuckhole ate it up like she was practicing for a hot dog eating contest."

by Birdielin14 September 16, 2008

Don’t swear on my christian server

Don’t swear on my christian server is when some ugh dont’t let me swear on mu christina server ...person. Swears. On your christian server.

Person: *beeep*
DONT SWEAR ON MAH CHRISTINA SERVER.
Don’t swear on my christian server :) dont swear in general.

by get the bleach January 24, 2020

sweating like kd lang at a Christian Singles dance

A funny way of saying that one is sweating profusely. The humor is derived from the fact that kd lang is a dyke, and would no doubt be uncomfortable surrounded by breeder Jesus freaks.

"I'm sweating like kd lang at a Christian Singles dance!" - Lisa Lampanelli (comedienne)

by thatzhowiroll June 26, 2008

I'm/he's/she's a Christian, so you can trust me/him/her

All the more reason not to trust the person... if the fact that someone is a "born-aginner" even has to be mentioned, then there must be something less-than-honest/honorable that said supposedly-clean-living person has to hide --- "methinks he doth protest too much"!

I have seldom if ever had any more luck with the honesty/integrity/consistency/reliability/kindness of someone about whom I was solemnly assured that, "I'm/he's/she's a Christian, so you can trust me/him/her"... in fact, if anything, these stuck-up Bible-thunpers often seem to be even BIGGER a**h**es than their "non-believer" counterparts! They think that "God will forgive them" for anything they do, and so they make little true effort to keep their word or otherwise treat their fellow humans with even basic decency.

by QuacksO July 27, 2019

Fort Worth Christian

A school located in NRH, Texas full of bratty, white rich kids that will never amount to anything in their life. Everything is handed to them with no work put in. None of the students have ever seen a single day of struggle. They are more offended by gay people than actual racism. The entire football team is full of r*pists, majority of the school knows but everyone acts like it's normal. The teachers are perverted and will kick you out of the school if you don't meet their standards: complete and total discipline, conservative beliefs, and a rich background. This school produces homophobic, racist, spoiled, and "evangelical christians". Love God, love people right?

A: "Do you know that guy that drives the big *ss truck that goes to Fort Worth Christian?"
B: "Oh yeah, the r*pist?"
C: "Wait... Which one?"

by don'ttrytoreachme September 8, 2021

Niels Christian

Niels Christian is a dude with an huge penis!
His donkey dick swings like a motherfucker

Who turned on the table fan?
oh shit its just Niels Christian swinging his cock

by nwfnkdneow2233 February 27, 2024

christian

christian is a nice,kind,cute, and shy sometimes he will always be there for you no matter what and will never cheat on you helps you through life's problems and would sacrifice himself for you even if you push him away he will always help you he's a goof ball mostly and makes a lot of mistakes will always have big dreams and never give up loves video games loves cuddles and is pure he could have low self esteem at the time and won't let you know just to keep you happy also is a little protective and will stand up for you

random person: christian's girl sucks she's so ugly
christian: *grabs shirt collar* now listen here don't talk about my girl or i'ma knock you out.
random person: OK OK just don't hurt me.

by lucifer 33442 May 7, 2019