Optometrist

A wannabe ophthalmologist that couldn't get into medical school. Also, predisposed to whining about his/her inadequecy and overall uselessness. In turn, often tries to convince others that they are capable of performing procedures usually done by ophthalmologists.

My mentally handicapped dyslexic monkey decided to become an optometrist.

by genetics textbook February 2, 2007

Optometrist Suprise

While your parnter is sleeping, jizz in her eyes, so when she wakes up, she cannot see.

Mary: "Why do you keep bumping into things Jen?"

Jen: "Because John gave me the optometrist surprise last night."

by Johnny Starizzle March 29, 2005

Mexican Optometrist

To ejaculate onto a woman's glasses.

I really gave Jane the mexican optometrist.

by James Hayes June 11, 2006

Angry Optometrist

To ejaculate semen onto the face of a woman, taking care to saturate both eyelids' exterior with semen.

Man, I wish a could bust an angry optometrist on Isa's fine ass.

by Big Robb August 7, 2006

Taking old one eye to the optometrist

The "act"...fucking, getting business done.

I had a wild night with Linda...I was taking old one eye to the optometrist when Mom walked in on us.

by Dano69 November 14, 2006

take the ole eye to the optometrist

1. having sex

2. having sex after a long period of not having sex

I haven't had any in a long time its time to take the ole eye to the optometrist!

by keri p March 12, 2010

Optometrist Love

Masturbating into your girl’s contact lens case and then having her put the contacts in in the morning.

Baby, when can we finish optometrist love?

We have to wait until the contacts have enough time to brine.

by Budew Hater October 12, 2018