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The Shartmann theory

A theory that states: if a football can be inserted into the asshole past half way, said asshole will create a suction and/or vaccume and ingulf the rest of the football if lubracation is in use
Bro1: Bro, me and jessie tested out the shartmann theory last night
Bro2: broooo how much lube did u guys go through
Bro1: brooooooooo idek like half the tube
by WalkingTalkingStephenHawking December 4, 2015
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shartattack

when someone freaks out so much for some reason that they shart in their pants leaving it all soggy.
Dude when that bus almost hit me i had a major shartattack, i got to go home.
by shartattack December 30, 2006
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Sharttard

The act of farting but accidentally crapping ones pants in a retarded fashion.
One who resembles the stains in a retarded persons underpants.
Dennis is a sharttard.
by crumb5336 May 5, 2009
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shartard

A person who sharts too often, thus arousing intense displeasure among the general public.
Did you just hear that? He's a shartard.
by lit_af March 2, 2017
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shartman

n. 1. one who sharts multiple times; a compulsive sharter
2. one who sharts while attempting to blast a massive fart on someone else
3. one who sharts quite often
n.
Tom: yo bro, jack just sharted in my bed
Steve: why did you even let him in your house?
Tom: why not?
Steve: oh, you don't know, jack's a shartman. he holds the guiness book of world record for most sharts ever and most sharts in an hour. i heard once he even sharted on his balls.
by the original shartman January 11, 2009
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shartmas

When someone has a horrible amount of work where they feel like they have been sharted on during the weeks/ days leading up to Christmas
Professor: You have 3 models and 6 drawings due in 2 weeks, but the week and half will be used to design.

Student: F.... me it must be shartmas
by five percent battery left November 13, 2011
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Sharimar

Sharimar is a beautiful and loving person. She may be a b*tch sometimes but she's a loving and caring person.
Sharimar is a great friend.
by Mercedes turner June 18, 2018
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