Skip to main content

Seppuku

the act of eating Japanese takeout naked in the middle of the road in order to impress friends and bestow honor to your family.
I commited Seppuku last night and my parents joined in.
I always do Seppuku every morning before work.
by SeppukuMan September 2, 2013
mugGet the Seppukumug.

Seppuku

"Seh-poo-koo"

A Japanese suicide ritual where you cut the belly open. It is believed that if you commit suicide this way, it will let your spirit exit the body at ease.
My daughter died because she commited Seppuku.
by NoeruChan June 23, 2016
mugGet the Seppukumug.

Seppuku

A masturbatory sexual act in which a man penetrates the outer sphincter of his anus with the tip of his beef whistle.
"Boy, I could sure go for some seppuku right now", thought Henry.
by HAILGOKU February 1, 2017
mugGet the Seppukumug.

Google Seppuku

"You use a Japanese text input tool and enter random Japanese characters into a google image search.

Then you count how many pages until you find an image so disturbing that you wish you never played the game."
"JESUS CHRIST!! What? Oh sorry. Not you. I was playing google seppuku and I lost. I lost big time."
by Stevy July 17, 2005
mugGet the Google Seppukumug.

Beard Seppuku

When a man attempts to trim up or style his beard and makes a fatal error, forcing him to go clean shaven rather than bear the shame of failure.

Seppuku is the custom of Japanese samurai to commit ritual suicide upon suffering great dishonor or failure.
Pierre: "Hey dude, why'd you go clean shaven?"
Antoine: "Ah.. well, I made a mistake while trimming and had to commit beard seppuku."
by OtterOwnage December 25, 2010
mugGet the Beard Seppukumug.

hillbilly seppuku

Amongst 'English'-speaking European immigrant cultures of the American continent, ritual suicide by firearm resulting from gross negligence; often the perpetrator's passage into the next life is eased by liquid refreshment.
Anthropologists discovered an ancient news broadcast revealing the fate of Alabama man and Ku Klux Klan Grand Wizard Jefferson Beauregard Bedford Forrest III committed hillbilly seppuku while cleaning his loaded .45 revolver on the toilet. He was surrounded by his close friends, the Coors family and the Miller family.
by CliticusTotalis March 28, 2019
mugGet the hillbilly seppukumug.

Modern Seppuku

The act of getting deployed, and being shot by a little Iraqi boy using his father's Russian assault rifle, thus making you a hero.
I don't want to hang myself, maybe i'll enlist and commit Modern Seppuku
by Walnutty November 30, 2021
mugGet the Modern Seppukumug.

Share this definition