Schmead darsted

When a female comes over to your lovely man cave and passes out within the confines of your bed. She than pees your bed.

Dude can you believe that Andrew got schmead darsted again?

No man that's impossible.

by Juicy john December 30, 2012

Schmearquad

the correct way to say okay in mhermerknees

“My pregnancy test came back negative.”

“Schmearquad.”

by mherm_queenie February 27, 2023

Hammer Schmear

A little dollop of thick smegma under the penile foreskin.

She looked so pretty with a bit of my hammer schmear on her upper lip.

I need to wash the hammer schmear a little better. It stinks.

by Dick Onchin October 13, 2020

Schmeaded

A general word used to describe a multitude of things that defy explanation. Can be a noun, pronoun, verb, adverb, adjective. Use is similar to Smurf from the 80's hit cartoon show The Smurf's. Can also be used in various forms ala schmeading, smeaded, smeading, schmeader, etc.

Dude you've just been schmeaded!

by MPREZYA September 25, 2005

German Schmear

When you are ass fucking a chick doggie style, and after pulling out, you wipe the shit of your dick and schmear it across her upper lip, former a 'Hitler' stash.

"I surprised my one-night stand with a German schmear... I haven't heard from her since."

by German Schmear April 21, 2022

Schmelard

another word for retard

God, you're such a schmelard

by kp24 April 4, 2009

Schmead

An unpredictably dumb person.
A surprisingly idiotic human being.

"Bradly, did you finish your biology homework?"
"No... I stapled it to the ceiling."
"Bradly, you are such a schmead."

by Aerodynamic-Arson-Ready-Or-Not October 25, 2019