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pensioner's leg

A thin, pale, knobbly, veiny penis.
by Anonymous September 2, 2003
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Misplaced Pensioner

A game for multiple people where one person takes a confused OAP and leaves them somewhere random. It's up to the others to find the Pensioner before they starve to death.
Steve: How's your grandad?
Dave: Didn't you hear? We were playing Misplaced Pensioner and just didn't get to him in time
by IDrinkAndKnowThings June 21, 2023
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pensionered

Describing someone who is paralytically drunk. This could include, but is not limited to, the person shitting or pissing their pants.
1) We just sat about getting pensionered on brandy.
2) She got so pensionered that she shat her pants.
by Dyltong June 18, 2013
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Pensioner

A pensioner is a old duffer who takes barley enough money to live and the popular show still game a legendary show and just be careful if there sleeping
Person 1: hawl is that old pensioner sleeping or is he deed
Person 2: al check SHES STEALING YOUR PENSION!!
Pensioner: huh whos there

Person 2: naw hes fine
by Steve not stephe January 11, 2020
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pensioner porn

A type of erotica, usually in the form of a romance novel or story, which to most under the age of sixty five, is just some lame smut, but to a pensioner, it is the sexiest thing since short legged drawers.
Harold: Hey Beth, did you hear that Jackie Collins wrote a new book?
Beth: Oh yeah Harold, she's my favourite pensioner porn author!
by Johann Sebastian Snuff March 14, 2021
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Cunt pensioner

A pimp; someone who make immoral gains from prostituting women.
At the red light District I found a cunt pensioner and his menu of women and what they will do.
by SupervisorSwampy July 21, 2020
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Soft as a pensioner's turd

When someone's actions are that soft that a pensioner's soft/runny stool holds more merit then their character and actions.
Worker A: Did you see old mate couldn't even lift a sandbag.

Worker B: Don't worry that cunt is as soft as a pensioner's turd, I have lost all hope with them.
by Billy Hunt (aka silly cunt) January 2, 2021
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