"if you make out here i will cut your lips and tongue from your head with a.... LINOLEUM KNIIIIIIIIIIFE!!!!!" -mastodon
by Shaka-zulu October 8, 2008
Get the mastodon mug.the taxonomy of mysteries; the practice of labeling confusion in order to make new conditions or weird phenomena feel understandable and normal
all entries in the urban dictionary come about through mystonomy
why do I feel the need to chase supermodels and buy sports cars even though I’m married with kids? via mystonomy, that becomes ‘mid-life crisis’ (source unknown)
why do I feel depressed? via mystonomy: ‘depression' (source unknown)
how is it that we don't fall off the planet? via mystonomy: 'gravity' by Isaac Newton
why am I utterly bored at work? via mystonomy: 'boreout' by Peter Werder
why does my penis shrink when it gets cold? via mystonomy: 'shrinkage' by Seinfeld
why do I feel the need to chase supermodels and buy sports cars even though I’m married with kids? via mystonomy, that becomes ‘mid-life crisis’ (source unknown)
why do I feel depressed? via mystonomy: ‘depression' (source unknown)
how is it that we don't fall off the planet? via mystonomy: 'gravity' by Isaac Newton
why am I utterly bored at work? via mystonomy: 'boreout' by Peter Werder
why does my penis shrink when it gets cold? via mystonomy: 'shrinkage' by Seinfeld
by Peter Greenwall February 4, 2009
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by Mr m December 18, 2013
Get the Mastodong mug.The bravest and richest of humans. Works on teleportation for everyone and world peace. The inventor of Mastodon. Started out as a hungry child on the south pole, worked his way up in the world to become the richest man in the universe, later married to Joan Mastodon, the richest person in the universe. Only rides electric bikes. Has a pet frog named Thomas.
by Marin Fowler December 19, 2022
Get the John Mastodon mug.1) An enormous, wooled elephant existing since before the time of modern man. A distant relative of the Wooly Mammoth, the mastodon preferred more temperate climates, although was found primarily in colder regions.
2) A brutish, uncouth, and ridiculously physically powerful character although somewhat lacking in intellect. Usually proclaims self as such.
2) A brutish, uncouth, and ridiculously physically powerful character although somewhat lacking in intellect. Usually proclaims self as such.
by TBarb May 8, 2005
Get the mastodon mug.by Davitz' Odakuhnitz' April 26, 2003
Get the mastodondong mug.A free, open-source, decentralized social network. Anyone can create or join an "instance" of Mastodon, where an instance is a unique domain name, and instances can be "federated" with each other so someone using one instance can interact with users on another instance. Comparable to email, where a Gmail user can email with a Yahoo mail user and vice versa. Comparable to Twitter, but less corporate and fewer Nazis. However, admins can run their instances however they wish, and may choose to allow/prohibit/monitor content that includes racism and other -isms, pornography, violence, etc.
The service allows posts to be placed behind a content warning (CW), and allows media to be marked as NSFW, and can be posted publicly, to followers only, as a direct message, or unlisted (where the post is public, but does not show in the federated timeline). Most instances allow posts to contain 500 characters available, and some instances allow much longer posts.
Posts are called "toots," and reposts are called "boosts," but instances can be customized to fit a theme or other preferences. Usernames are formatted as @username@instance.domain, such as @gargron@mastodon.social, where user @gargon is on the instance mastodon.social.
The service allows posts to be placed behind a content warning (CW), and allows media to be marked as NSFW, and can be posted publicly, to followers only, as a direct message, or unlisted (where the post is public, but does not show in the federated timeline). Most instances allow posts to contain 500 characters available, and some instances allow much longer posts.
Posts are called "toots," and reposts are called "boosts," but instances can be customized to fit a theme or other preferences. Usernames are formatted as @username@instance.domain, such as @gargron@mastodon.social, where user @gargon is on the instance mastodon.social.
by nothin2seehere June 3, 2017
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