Lex the Impaler

A mutant chigga with a hyperextensive penis long enough to impale most people. His favorite trick is to sneak up behind people while they tie their shoes, and ram his iron pecker into their anus and out through the tops of their heads - killing them instantly.

"Run, women get inside your homes and bar the doors! Men, grab whatever weapons you have and flock to fight the beast in the Town Square. The creature, Lex the Impaler, has broken through the city gates!"

by Anonymous April 29, 2003

taylor impaler

a man fucks another man in the ass through a donut.

James: Scott gave me a great taylor impaler.
Andrew: really i should try him out.

by wisemanug May 8, 2006

The Impaler

A man with a large/thick penis whose superior genetics allows him to thouroughly dominate the opposite sex. The sometimes rough and repeated pounding of her guts with The Impaler's shaft may leave the woman sore the next day(s).

Oh my gosh, I'm like, so sore. The Impaler crushed my insides last night.

by TheMysteriousCharmer June 6, 2016

chad the impaler

The potentially best male porn star name known to mankind. Based off the legendary historical figure Vlad the Impaler who also impaled thousands.

"Oh man, I get to film with Chad the Impaler, I hope he spikes my rectum"

by cjt119 March 13, 2019

Vlad the Impaler

The male sex organ used to eject semen and urine out.

More commonly know as a "penis".

Vlad the Impaler invaded the Ottoman Empire.

by HulkNurseSMASH May 27, 2010

Vlad the Impaler

The nickname of Big Al, receiving this name from the extremely large penis he has. So gargantuan that in the process of sexual intercourse Al has impaled many of his ladies/victims going from the vagina straight through the brain.
It is also believed that this anomaly, I mean the pure massiveness of his penis, is the result of Big Al being the child of Chuck Norris.

Shit! Vlad the Impaler has struck again! Well boys I don’t think this bitch will be walking for a while.

by Lead_Ballz July 21, 2008

Vlad the Impaler

This is where an individual has to take a shit in the wee hours of the morning and sleepily stumbles into the bathroom without turning on the lights. Being half asleep and disoriented in the dark,the individual squats,but is off a few inches,and sits on the handle to the toilet brush or commode plunger located next to the toilet,thusly impaling themselves.

After my terrifying Vlad the Impaler experience,I now religiously turn on the bathroom lights.

by wolfbait51 December 11, 2011