Festivus

Proposed nondenominational alternative to Christman and Hanukkah.
It's a Festivus for the Rest of Us!
by yadayadayada April 22, 2005
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Festivus

Adapted from the episode of Seinfeld; "The Strike". It must take place between any holiday period. However, it is much preferred to coincide with the December to February holiday atmosphere.

The Festivus consists of "The Airing of Grievances" and the "Feats of Strength". However, in accordance with the official Brisbane-Adelaide agreement “The Airing of Grievances” will be now known as “The Time of Crap Speeches” and “Feats of Strength” will be now known as “Crushing Booze”.

There is an icon known as “The Festivus Pole”. It must be in the form of a microphone stand. It should be tall, golden, long and skinny. The microphone must be broken by the end of Festivus, during intoxicated karaoke sessions.

In the beginning there was Festivus One. It was held in Brisbane in February 2003 and, behold, it was very good. The second Festivus was held in December 2003 in Adelaide and there was light.

And on the seventh day of each Festivus sanctuary will be given to those who have gone without sleep and without walking in a straight line. And he shall rest on the seventh day from all his sauce which he has hacked.

Finally, each day you pass in between each Festivus must be spent spreading forth the good word of Festivus and the adventures that were had.
"A Festivus, For the Rest of Us!" - Frank Costanza
by Alex December 23, 2003
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Festivus

A rare holiday that combines the traditions of Jews and Christians. They often use a metal pole for their center piece of decoration instead of a christmas tree or lights.
It was once used on Seinfeld.
by Jason June 30, 2004
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festivus pole

1. An undecorated aluminium pole used to celebrate festivus.

2. A recurring erection that occurs at a festivus party.
Dude, Tony is sporting some serious festivus pole while talking to that hot chick.
by matelalique December 14, 2011
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Festivus

by penis4564 February 12, 2023
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Festivus opening

An act of closeted homosexual relations between a scruffy straight man and a metrosexual in denial.
I should not have gotten into that festivus opening last, I will be sore for days and I can't, nay won't, wear sweatpants.
by Patty90 December 17, 2015
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