Beardability

The ability to grow facial hair.

Andrea Pirlo has got great beardability.

by JonnyD1988 July 5, 2014

Bingley Beard

Someone who isn't a tramp but has a tramp's beard because their that tight to spend money to either shave or trim it.

Looks at that scruffy twat, he has a job but is sporting a Bingley Beard

by Greg_the_Smeg February 12, 2019

Beardson's Law

A phenomena whereby the browner a person is, the higher the likelihood their smoke alarm batteries need to be replaced.

For example, when observing a black person in their natural habitat, if you listen closely you will likely hear the distinct low battery alert chirp of a smoke-alarm.

I was on Omegle last night and talked to a bunch of black people. I could hear the chirp of a smoke-detector low battery alarm in every one of their houses. Beardson's Law, am I right?

by urban groyper August 29, 2022

Unix beard

Facial hair that all Unix experts are mysteriously compelled to grow. The length, bushiness, and unkemptness of the Unix beard are all directly proportional to the owner's expertise. Having a Unix beard is a great way to ensure that you never get laid.

Bob's a true Unix genius, just look at the size of his Unix beard!

by josh@rootpoot November 19, 2003

Exam Beard

The facial hair that grows in the weeks running up to, and during, exam season. Normally due to a person's desperate need to cram as much revision into that short space of time as possible, causing them to disregard things like basic hygeine, eating properly, social events, sleep etc

Girlfriend: Wow Mark, you need a shave!
Student: Shave!? I don't have time to shave! I've got a multi-choice business AP on monday, my spanish oral wednesday afternoon not to mention my chemistry resits!
Girlfriend: So you're gonna go to class with that rediculous pubescent stubble on your face?
Student: It's my exam beard.

by Tactful June 7, 2010

Phantom Beard Syndrome

Similar to phantom limb syndrome, Phantom Beard Syndrome (PBS) occurs when a man has had facial hair for an extended period of time and then for whatever reason decides to shave it. He is likely to still think the facial hair is there, feel it, or even attempt to stroke it even though it is gone.

I shaved off my goatee before joining the army 4 years ago and I can still feel it today. I thing I have Phantom Beard Syndrome.

by Renegade1835 August 29, 2010

Beards ago

Descriptive for an incident far gone enough that you have since grown and shaved several beards.

Guy #1: You need to get back in the game mate
Guy #2: I shagged that Geordie girl in Zante
Guy #1: Shut up, that was fucking beards ago

by bluejay19986 November 21, 2010