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Asteroid Fantasy

A name for a person who has a resume for being fired all the time and sits on the computer all day searching for upcoming asteroids that might hit the earth, conspiracy theories of complete bullshit and proof of ghosts and aliens, etc. often tries to explain it to you over loud music that rattles the windows. Dont ask this person for anything because the answer is always ''no!''
Tuesday, 2:30 a.m.

Asteroid Fantasy: "Wow! Vatican struck by lightning hours after Pope resigns!"
Someone: "cool, turn the fuckin music down dude I can barely hear myself talk, let alone you!"
Asteroid Fantasy: "I'm fuckin mind blown!" (turns the music down and takes a drink of beer) "Can I get a hit? it's been a long stressful day and a hit would be wonderful right now."
Someone: (sighs) ya... here... just don't burn it all (hands him the pipe thinking about how lame that excuse to get a hit was)
Someone else: "Can I have a smoke?"

Asteroid Fantasy: "No!" (hits the pipe)
Someone: "I'm goin to bed"
Asteroid Fantasy and Someone else: "Goodnight man see you in the morning."
Asteroid Fantasy: "Wow look at this!" (clicking on his computer)
Someone: "It was an Asteroid Fantasy ladies and gentlemen" (as if he were talking to a crowd of people while on a podium to make fun of him before going to sleep)
Someone Else: "Haha!" (backs up Someone with another quote) "Good morning this is Asteroid Fantasy with breaking news..."
Asteroid Fantasy: "Whatever" (turns the music back up while Someone tries to go to sleep)
Someone Else: "Ya I hope the neighborhood likes this song or if not the sheriffs might like it if we are lucky"
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Astelonia

Astelonia is a micronation located in the hearts of its people.
by Earenstain October 29, 2021
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Asteroids.

This word adequately replaces haemorrhoid. It sounds more appropriate!
The angle of the dangle of my asteroids is driving me barmy and they itch like hell!
by John F. Tomlinson. March 28, 2003
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afterloom

The feeling after one trips one's face off and is still slightly tripping. The trademark feelings of the afterloom are the general fogginess of the mind, incoherent speech, and a slight body euphoria. The afterloom typically lasts about an hour or two, or until one falls asleep.
Alex: Hey man, are you good to drive or are you still tripping?

Jimbo: Naw man I'm good I just have a real nice afterloom from this 2C- B
by Ziwetian September 13, 2010
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Asteroids

A condition when the Fecal Impaction of the Colon is so solid and an has become an immobile bulk mass of human feces that develops one's rectum as it has a resulted in a solid mass of constipation in one's ass, such that, it feels as if it is, “Chocked Full O' Nuts” which will not pass under normal circumstances and may have to be dug out with one's fingers or similar tools. i.e., "to shit a brick!"
Tommy: "You ok in their… Won?"

Won: "Oh yes yes, me mighty fine, it is my ass that is the problem, and I am in a state of constipated and my ass is full of Asteroids and feels like it is Chocked Full O' Nuts”.

Jim: "What's the hold up with you two guys in this restroom; it’s time to watch the game."

Tommy: "Oh, it's Won; again, he say's his butt is so clogged up with Asteroids that he just can't shit and is in a lot of pain.

Jim: "What?"

Joe: "Oh, hell you guys, I have been telling you for years that Won is just full of shit."

Jim: “What a crock of shit, we are going to miss the game.”

Bobby: “Who gives a shit?”

Tommy: “Well, evidently Won does!”
by Billy BullSchitter April 23, 2017
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Asteroid

Any vehicle, especially on the Interstate, driving ten or more miles an hour under the speed limit. See also asteroid field.
All these asteroids puttering down the road are killing me.
by Whitebred April 3, 2004
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barbarian asteroid

The act of 2 beings mating analy and the giver pulls out, and while the takers anus is still gaping, the taker BMs into the givers anus.
Sandy got a barbarian asteroid from Ronald yesturday, it was wide.
by nicklights December 13, 2007
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