shoelace express

The means of transportation you employ when walking somewhere.

"I've been taking the shoelace express to work ever since that bitch wrecked my car."

by Sean February 16, 2005

German Shoelaces

The act of backing up into someone's face while they're bending over to tie their shoes, for the sole purpose of farting directly into their face. This act can be performed without removing your pants, but it is hilarious to do it with your pants down. For optimal performance, consider eating Ex-Lax before performing this act to brown-wash your victim.

They say the German Shoelaces will grow hair on your chest -- if it doesn't burn the hair out of your nose, first. Hope you don't get a turd to the eyeball, man!
Whoa! That German Shoelaces gave him a turdy Hitler moustache! Sick, man!

by Donkey Punching Queen July 14, 2011

shoelace

To emotionally tie your partner down in a relationship.

(Not to be confused with any sexual act).

Ted: Sorry, Mike. My girlfriend made plans for next weekend, too.

Mike: Man, we never hang out anymore. She has shoelaced you, and you don't even realize it.

by Bryce King January 23, 2011

I like your shoelaces

A *secret* phrase used to try to identify fellow bloggers from Tumblr. Used on other websites or in real life regardless of the footwear they are wearing.

The correct response is "I stole them from the president."

"Hey, uh... I like your shoelaces?"
"I stole them from the president *snigger*"
(Exchange URLs etc)

by elemeno-pee.tumblr.com November 20, 2012

shoelace belt

You have totally missed the point of a shoelace belt. Skateboarders wear it for functionality not style it doesn't feel very comfortable having a real belt digging in your side while bending down for pop. True some belts feel better than others, but it does not compare to a shoelace belt.

People not being lazy or trying to be cool while wearing a shoelace belt example REAL skateboarders.

by bigohiostatus April 18, 2008

Shoelace

The pattern of a mans released load, forms the pattern of a shoelace.

Someone just pulled a Gary Coleman, and shoelaced the toilet seat.

by MG Boys November 21, 2004

Tying Shoelaces

A euphemism (another word for) giving a blowjob. Comes from the scene in Harry Potter and the half blood prince when Ginny and Harry are talking, and Ginny says "shoelace" and bends down to tie Harry's shoelace, but it looks like she's going to suck his cock.

Ron: where is Ginny?
Hermione: probably tying shoelaces.
Ron: what? whose?
Hermione: Harry's.
Ron: WTF?!

by SexyRanchDressingMan August 17, 2009