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Upper Respitory Johnson

When a guy grabs a girl (or guy), spins him/her upside down and then shoves his penis inside his/her mouth so quickly, aggressively, and deeply, that she has difficulty breathing and eventually develops an upper respitory problem. This is very unsafe, and has sometimes resulted in death. To upper respitory johnson someone is to be spun upside down and develop an upper respitory condition, as described above. Only for the most hardcore of us.
Wow, Frank just upper respitory johnson'd that guy!
by theURjohnson2 April 16, 2009
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respiratory therapy (RT)

A smoking break; smoke break; to smoke.

A phrase used to ask someone if they wanna go for a smoking break with you (in a cooler way).

Used to combat the notion that smoking breaks are 100% negative occasions, since the respiratory therapy they offer is often more than 100% beneficial to the recipient.
Andy: "Hey Chris, RT?"

Chris: "Sure, I'm totally down for some respiratory therapy right now."

Tom: "You two do realize the lung cancer risks right?"

Andy: "Are you kidding me? Respiratory therapy (RT) is totally good for you."

Chris: "Yup RT'ing 2-3 times a day actually improves your mental health and sharpness."
by AttiFinch June 9, 2011
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The Respirator

The female version of a "teabag". The act of a females genitalia over an individuals face while they are unaware or unconcious.
"Oh my God I cant breathe, Stephanie just gave me the respirator!"

"Im totally gonna give Steve The Respirator right now while hes passed out wasted!"
by Ryan C. (Papa Graybush) January 26, 2009
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Mexican respirator

Squat over someone's face. Lower your testicles into their eye sockets, and fart in their mouth
Everyone at the tortilla factory explosion couldn't Beleive their eyes when Pedro, dying of smoke inhalation, was given just enough air to fill his lungs and escape the blaze, thanks to Manuel's quick implementation of the Mexican respirator
by Slaughterhouse.2 June 6, 2013
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Respiratory Therapist

AKA The hospitals bitch.

Respiratory Therapist are highly specialized members of a patient's healthcare team that diagnose and treat respiratory disease and disorders.

Respiratory Therapist are usually thought to be idiots who are only needed supply oxygen christmas tree nipples and administer Albuterol to patients who choked on their breakfast oatmeal. They are only thought to be knowledgeable when RNs have exhausted all ideas to help patients or when shit his the fan.
The best skill Respiratory Therapist possess is the ability to put SPO2 probes back on patients fingers when RNs report that they cannot get a reading.
Ms. Johnson keeps ringing the call bell because she is anxious, let me call the respiratory therapist in there for an albuterol treatment so I can finish my lunch.
by Stabn722 March 14, 2017
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gerbil respirator

When an aeration pump, hose and stone are used to keep an gerbil or other small animal alive within the colon of a man. This increases the prostate stimulation time. Usually, battery powered bait aerator's are preferred because of compactness.
Rob: I got rats because they were cheaper than gerbils. You got the gerbil respirator.

George: I got this D cell powered bait aerator for $7.99, at Walmart.

Rob: Ah fuck, we forgot the tubes.

George: C'mon we're loose enough to go tubeless. You practically need vise grips to keep the little bastard in you long enough to cum.

Rob: Oh do you know me!

(Gay loving ensues.)
by Cunty Fresh Fanatic October 30, 2010
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upper respitory infection

General an excuse for pussies to stay home from work. A glorified word for a cold.
When I got a cold, I mean an Upper Respitory Infection, my cat and I stayed home for a month while my dad picked peaches off the farm.
by Dennis AKA Fat April 29, 2005
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