PROCTOLOGIST

Also known as: A shitty job.

Ernie: You know Burt, McDonald's would go under if you weren't there to run the frier!

Bert: Yeah, I'm a regular proctologist.

by Big Turd Burgler April 10, 2008

unlicensed proctologist

A TSA agent.

1. I sure hope I don't get raped at the airport by the unlicensed proctologists in the security line.

2. TSA Motto: Giving free prostate exams since 2001.

3. Getting a free prostate exam is just a few off-color jokes about a bomb away.

by TurkTurkleton January 4, 2012

neuro-proctologist

A medical professional that helps people get their head out of their arse.

That Stephen Harper/Republican party/NRA sure could use a neuro-proctologist.

by doctorwhat January 25, 2013

Forensic Proctologist

Someone who looks up your arse to see what crawled up there and died

Man you need a forensic proctologist. That is pure evil.

I went to see a forensic proctologist but he choked to death when I farted.

by Smelly Fella January 17, 2009

NEURO-PROCTOLOGIST

A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL THAT STUDIES THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN SOMEONES BRAIN, NERVOUS SYSTEM AND THE SHIT THEY HAVE ACCUMULATED IN IT.

ALL POLITICIANS ARE SUCH SHIT HEADS, THEY NEED A WEEKLY VISIT TO A NEURO-PROCTOLOGIST!!

by PROFESSOR C-YA May 12, 2009

psychiatric proctologist

Medical specialist who helps people get their heads out of their asses

Dipshit, you are a fool; you require a psychiatric proctologist to help you get your head out of your ass.

by Herbos, a prince June 8, 2021

Proctologist boot

Proctologist boot, where you take a hookers stiletto and strap it on your foot and you banger in the ass with it.

Man, that chick guy I met last night had the most baddest stilettos. I had to give her a proctologist boot.

(David): man that chick last night had some expenses stilettos
(Benny): yeah that’s why I had to take her home last night and give her the proctologist boot.
(David): I get it now that’s why she’s walking so funny man you must’ve done that for hours

by 0069RIGID December 10, 2025