porch swinging liquor pig

noun. This is used to descibe a drunkard who does nothing all day but sit around and consume alcholic beverages. It also helps if said person is a fat bastard.

Jason and Tom are so lazy, they are the biggest porch swinging liquor pigs I have ever met.

by C_B_Savage December 19, 2006

porch sucker

n. This expression is rooted in Confederate America when cruel and unusual punishment was a common thing. The porch sucker, much like a cotton picker, was a deliquent servant. This bottom feeder was sentenced to sucking the plantation porch clean on hands and knees until thy had served their time.

In modern times the porch sucker is some crazy ass fool who has neglected his/her duties as a friend, or stood you up to hook up with the opposite sex.

v. You can also say "this sucks a porch!". This implys a great distaste for some form of delinquency or inadequacy.

"I can't believe you ditched me to suck her porch"

"God, my stupid porch sucking friends are so unreliable!"

"@#?!!@! PORCH SUCKER!!@@#@!?!"

by Genemarie August 12, 2005

Porch-Screaming

The act of showing up and screaming at your soon to be cowardly ex-boyfriend's house after learning he was cheating on you via photos from shared friends on Facebook.

April went to Tony's house knocked on the door upon learning he was a dirty dog cheater via Facebook. Tony didn't answer the door, yet she saw him moving around in the house. Because he's a lying, cheating, coward, April began Porch-Screaming his relationship atrocities until he came out of the house.

by Apirella of the Kind March 17, 2011

porch slacker

Someone who is readily suitable for any endeavor, but is too self aware to ever leave his house. A mental block that most commonly affects teen-aged through middle-aged men (and some women) who face anxiety when leaving their house. See also: herb.

Susan: Alonso was so totally stoked for this party, but I don't see him anywhere..
Jake: Yea but he's such a porch slacker, he's probably masturbating to those spring fling pictures I posted on his facebook page.

by EEPERSCREEPERS May 21, 2010

Porch Sitter

Women in military housing that sit on the front porch, smoke cigarettes and talk on the phone all day while their kids run around unsupervised.

Damn! That woman across the street is a porch sitter!

by money_over_bitches December 28, 2009

Porch Spam

Unsolicited junk mail flyers and adverts that litter your doorstep.

"I'm stepping out to get a burrito - cya in a bit."

<opens front door, triggering a rain of glossy cardstock all over the porch>

"Aw man, fucking porch spammers!"

by captain manly December 5, 2012

Porch seagull

Want to be gang member

“Omg look at all those porch seagulls

by Duhitsagangmember September 20, 2020