Haslam

{Haz-luhm} noun: a person of wealth, affluence, or social status who repeatedly makes poor decisions or mistakes involving a franchise in the spirit of sports and competition.

Verb: the function of making a sports franchise uncompetitve and disdained through consistently poor decisions by a person or persons of wealth, affluence, or social status.
Noun example: Did you see ownership is trading our best player? What a Haslam.

Verb example: Wow, we really Haslamed this offseason now that Myles Garrett was traded.
by Anonymous Browns Fan February 03, 2025
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Haslam

aka "Jed Clampett." A hillbilly who fell ass-backwards into inheriting multi-generational wealth, but he's as stupid as the day is long. And despite all of his money, he just can't stop tripping over his own dick.
- You're kidding me, THAT guy owns a sports franchise?

- Yeah, he's a real Haslam.
by Roberto_Shenanigans February 07, 2025
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Braden Haslam

6 foot 1 inch tall, sex dog who is number 1, however he thinks that that mac's are better than surface book's
Braden Haslam is cool, but he thinks that macs are better than surface's
by Braden Haslam October 18, 2019
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