ted haggard

Ted Arthur Haggard is an American evangelical preacher. He is also known for having fucked Mike Jones, denying it, then accepting it and subsequently resigning his leadership of the National Association of Evangelicals.

Ted Haggard: I am a deceiver and a liar. The fact is I am guilty of sexual immorality...There is a part of my life that is so repulsive and dark that I've been warring against it all of my adult life.

Me: You're teh ghey. Both literally and metaphorically.

Ted Haggard: I know...

by Rodrigoh! December 11, 2008

Haggard's Law

The likelihood of a person harboring secret desires to engage in sexual and/or romantic activities with members of the same sex is directly proportional to the frequency and volume of said person's vocalized objections to homosexuality.

Haggard's Law, Ted Haggard, Roy Ashburn, Priests from that Vatican Scandel

by maxiplatypus March 5, 2010

Hagaren

The commonly accepted abreviation for Hagane no Renkinjutsushi (Fullmetal Alchemist)
A popular Japanese anime following the adventure of two brothers, Edward and Alphonse Elric who commit the ultimate taboo of trying to revive their dead mother with alchemy. The transmutation fails, resulting in the loss of Ed's left leg and right arm, and Al's entire body. The two set out (Ed now equiped with prosthetic limbs and Al now merely a soul housed in a suit of armor)in search of the legendary Philosopher's Stone in the hopes of restoring their bodies to normal.

See also: Full Metal Alchemist and Fullmetal Alchemist

The Hagaren fandom has spawned some of the best fan crack around; why, just look at Lightbulb!Envy. (see lightbulb)

by Firien May 13, 2005

hangar 18

a hanger at wright-patterson air force base that held evidence to the roswell new mexico u.f.o. crash.

welcome to a fortress tall take some time to show you around imposible to break these walls for you see the steel is much to strong computer banks to rule the world insturments to sight the stars, possibly ive seen to much hangar 18 i know to much

by jacob tweedy April 15, 2008

Haggard Garage

A youtube channel that panders to children who cannot afford to properly modify a vehicle. They are the epitome of ricers, and they have this idea that if they call themselves ricers ironically that they have defused their detractors (the I <3 Haters argument). Their feature vehicle is a pitiful Miata that begs for sweet release from life. Haggard Garage is the physical embodiment of everything that is wrong with young car "enthusiasts" today.

Adult - Why is that Miata making that god awful sound?
Child #1 - Because Haggard Garage they do it for fun.
Child #2 - Because racecar lol XXDDDD Haggard Garage that's why.
Child #3 - I live in Connecticut and want to go to the Haggard Garage meet, but f*ck I'm 11 and don't have a car.

by swag777 October 13, 2015

The Sammy Hagar Paradox

First seen in his song entitled "I Can't Drive 55" it describes the notion that it is physically impossible for Sammy Hagar to travel at the speed of 55 mph (miles per hour). No matter what mode of transportation whether it is a car, bike, airplane, etc, it is impossible for him to travel exactly 55 mph. The speedometer on any transportation device that Sammy Hagar occupies will never read the speed of 55 mph. Instead it will skip over 55 mph to 56 mph or 54 mph (depending on whether the vehicle is increasing or deceasing speed). Therefore, it is thought that perhaps Sammy Hagar possesses some power that allows him to bend time and space to his will, but only at the speed of 55 mph. This act of bending time and space is currently being researched by Professor Stephen Hawking the British theoretical physicist.

I saw Sammy Hagar today in his car with one foot on the brake and one on the gas and i swear that he couldn't go 55 mph...its that damn Sammy Hagar Paradox

A simple fun game to play with The Sammy Hagar Paradox is whenever you are traveling and see a speed limit sign of 55 mph you must be the first to yell "I can't drive 55!"... don't worry everyone wins because it is The Sammy Hagar Paradox

Whenever Sammy Hagar looks at a 55 mph speed limit sign it spontaneously combust

You can take Sammy Hagar's licence and post his face, wanted dead or alive, but it doesn't matter because he can't drive 55

by El Oso Blanco June 26, 2010

Orion Dajnowicz Damian Monte Haggard Garage Arson

When accidentally starting a huge wildfire whilst on a cross-country roadtrip and fleeing the scene. Then years later one of the "arsonists" blabs about it, self snitching during a vlog.
Then, after investigations it turns out that this same crew have been involved/implicated in numerous fires.

Orion Dajnowicz Damian Monte Haggard Garage Arson

"Yoo, did you here about the shop Fire last night?" Orion Dajnowicz Damian Monte Haggard Garage Arson

"Yoo, did you hear about the wildfire at The Thing, in Arizona?" Orion Dajnowicz Damian Monte Haggard Garage Arson

by ArmourChinker January 3, 2023