Fapster 

Someone who's so reliable like the weather in England.

Mr. Heiopei is such a fapster, he always misses the deadlines.

Fapster by San Te February 9, 2018

Fapster 

A fat hipster

That bearded fapster is trying to sell you some doughnuts.

Fapster by FlipsterS March 29, 2019

slapster fapster 

A girthy, manly, testosterone fueled mad man. Do not fuck with him he will slap you so hard you will ascend to the fifth-dimension and immediately die.

Girl: me me want big boy
Me: Guess what, me me slapster fapster
Girl:*cums everywhere (in the fifth dimension)*
Me: yes.
Girl:*fucking dies*

slapster fapster by Slapster Fapster October 16, 2018

Move Faster Pokey!!!!! 

The most epic voice crack in LP history. Originated from the voice of LPer ProtonJon, is now a popular meme among the gaming community.

Move faster Pokey!!!!!! FASTER!!! For the love of god faster!!

Move Faster Pokey!!!!! by pbudp January 15, 2011

Paddle faster, I hear banjos! 

A common exclamation when in or around hillbilly infested areas. Doesn't necessarily need to be used when in a canoe; merely a warning to the other non-hillbillies in the vicinity.

It was a bright and sunny day when my father and I decided to go fishing down by the ol' waterhole. I remember that the seagulls looked like delicate little clouds, fluttering in the breeze. We made our way to our canoe and rowed out, fishing rods in hand and a song in our hearts. As we made our way down to the waterhole, we became aware of an eerie silence. The trees around us swayed to a halt. Then, quietly at first but raising in intensity, we heard the twang of a banjo. My father turned to me, his face colorless as he said "Paddle faster, I hear banjos!"

Paddle faster, I hear banjos! by Survival Guide May 12, 2010

faster than a scalded dog

This idiomatic expression can describe any kind of movement, but is especially linked to running. A scalded dog would be moving as quickly as it was capable of doing, and it would be motivated by pain and fear - that combination makes for some serious speed.

When the bandit saw the police coming, he ran faster than a scalded dog.

faster than a scalded dog by RobertPlanty April 28, 2012

faster than a cat can lick its ass 

Ever see a cat lick its ass? Then you know it's pretty damn fast.

When I heard my old man coming home right when I was in the middle of some afternoon delight with my next door neighbor, he gathered up his clothes, rock-hard dick and all, and jumped out the window faster than a cat can lick its ass.

faster than a cat can lick its ass by Goobershanker August 9, 2006