Beached Whale

The beached whale is a term given for a fat or otherwise unattractive person that hits on you at a bar or club and, despite your disinterest or general disgust, this person will try multiple attempts on you, and follow you around.

"i was out last night and this whale totally beached on me."

or

"where were you? there's two hotties wanting to buy us drinks."
"ugh, sorry. beached whale wouldnt get off me."

by tboners January 4, 2012

beached whale

When you take a dump while sitting on the toilet backwards so that your fecal matter ends up on the dry part of the toilet and not in the water.

Last time I used Gabe's bathroom I left a gnarly beached whale.

by wigwam69 September 9, 2006

beach whale

a fat woman who wears a tiny bikini.

Damn son! look at that beach whale over there!

by RockinClueless November 14, 2004

beached whale

An individual who is confined to their bed due to their morbid obesity; one who wallows in their own excrements.

"Whoa! look at that beached whale"

by ricemond December 6, 2003

beached whale

When fecal matter in a toilet is only partly submerged in water and partially lay on the dry porcelain of the toilet bowl.

"Shit. Look at that beached whale! Sorry brown buddy, I didn't mean to let you perish like that."

by Jerome Jenkins May 10, 2006

Beached whale

A term for someone whos been boozed up

Damn, Julio really drank too much. He looks like a beached whale

by Ncg13 April 16, 2017

beached whale

similar to awkward turtle, denoting the occurance of an awkward situation.

the beached whale is performed by placing one hand on top of the other, face up, and thumbs rotating.

JB walked into a room full of naked hispanic men, all playing the flute while whipping each other with palm leaves.

To alleviate the awkward situation, JB starts to freestyle rap. This makes the entire situation even more awkward, and the naked hispanic men all begin to do the beached whale.

by HitStick93 April 6, 2010