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Captain Machine

a bozo who has the IQ of a peanut and cant seal the deal.
He thinks hes a good wrestler but in the end hes just a lame ass bum who took steriods to win. Captain Stretchy is the real champ. I am not Captain Stretchy
Hey you just killed a cute kitty. Good one Captain Machine!
by Captain Midget May 14, 2006
mugGet the Captain Machinemug.

captain long dong

A name given when your friend claims he’s fucked multipule chicks in the same week. And when someone is just a Cunt
Dick: I fucked 4 chicks yesterday
You: wow that’s so Impressive Captain long Dong
by Just Chucktesta April 21, 2018
mugGet the captain long dongmug.

Phone captain

Someone who's your good friend/best friend on the phone, but can't be bothered meeting up face to face to chill or have tea/coffee together.

Pretty much anyone, anyone that's a good friend on the phone, but cbf/is not interested in catching up face to face.
George: Hey Mike, I spoke to Tony on the phone, he often sounds like a good friend, but yet either can't be bothered catching up or else keeps lying to me that we'll catch up face to face?

Mike: Dude, that's a "phone captain".

George: What's a phone captain?

Mike: Like "keyboard warrior", except much nicer of course!
by Fair Care - Care Fair :) October 12, 2016
mugGet the Phone captainmug.

Captain Long

Certified helicopter operator. On side he tends to take dick slinging very seriously with snapbots.
Captain longs leaks had him dick slinging on camera.
by Allie- Snapbot March 31, 2025
mugGet the Captain Longmug.

Captain carrot

Jewish superhero who protects the 3047
by Roughyy99 August 21, 2020
mugGet the Captain carrotmug.

Captain Crunch

The best cereal, if anyone says otherwise they are most likely gay
by BarfingChicken December 11, 2018
mugGet the Captain Crunchmug.

captain useless

A nigga who always be lacking. Sometimes he makes a joke and nobody laugh but we still love the guy.
-Guys why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate 9.

Everyone:
-Man you really did just pull a captain useless.
by ButFuggle April 16, 2020
mugGet the captain uselessmug.

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