Buttering my elf

Masturbating

I've been buttering my elf at the library.

by Vuljatar January 6, 2012

badgering the witness

to masturbate, the violent manipulation or aggressive stroking of ones genitals

I couldn't get it up for Mary because I was badgering the witness all afternoon.

Susan caught her brother badgering the witness while watching Full House.

by theanarchist July 21, 2013

Blistering anal ordeal

1. A very potent, very hot expulsion of air from the anus. The heat usually lingers and is uncomfortable to both of which have "smelt" and "dealt".

2. A feverish, scalding, irritating defecating experience; often diarrheal and requires a cream, salve, or ointment to calm the burning sensation. Can be caused by spicy foods and some viruses.

3. A severe rash caused by an STD contracted by anal intercourse.

4. An instance in which someone is trying to get an asshole to behave sensibly, but they continue to make a scene.

("Dude, I had a blistering anal ordeal last night, it was real shitty!")

by Caustie January 30, 2015

buttering the week

When you sit in a park and eat bread. Preferably hot!
Game Grumps Kitty love ep

"It's when you sit in the park and eat bread. Buttering the week!" — Dan

by Tarrabyte November 15, 2018

nerd-bateing

A nerd who is masterbating.

After the star trek convension i caught my friend who went with me in the bathroom with a playboy nerd-bateing.

by LMxDurgex December 26, 2008

Clive Barkering

Repeatedly grabbing your semen the moment you ejaculate and throwing it at someone/something.

I was Clive Barkering all over my hallway last night because I thought I could exorcise ghosts with my cum.

by Creela September 22, 2015

Clive Barkering

When you cum into your hand, and throw it into someone's face, a.k.a seagulling

"Dude, my friend and I stayed up all night Clive Barkering each other"
"That's gross, bro."

by Batman43 September 22, 2015