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Twyford CofE High School

A Church of England state secondary school in Acton, West London that likes to pretend it's private when really it's just full of wet dons (and that's just the teachers). If you want decent GCSE grades and least 1 mental illness this is the school for you. Don't get too comfortable- if you're dumb they don't mind kicking you out for sixth form so they can take private school students instead. To identify a Twyford student just look for an ankle length skirt, a school logo branded bag (because it's illegal to have anything else) and a teenager who looks one assessed homework away from a mental breakdown. Mostly full of middle class teenagers who are either nittys, neeks or chavs.
"The highest achieving state school in Ealing is Twyford CofE High School"
by alnevertell March 31, 2020
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Coffee Shits

After drinking coffee and eating tons of carbs then running you take a fiery, steamy, burning hot shit with a fudge-like consistency. It usually happens within an hour of coffee, with a smell similar to dead people, shit, and coffee combined. Even worse, it strikes without warning for the next hour leaving your pants in a shit covered hell.
Guy A "I love drinking coffee then eating pasta then running! Don't you?"
Guy B "Dude, your gonna get coffee shits..."
Guy A "Naa, I've got a colon of steel I...I need to change..."
by Dr. mcjesus100 March 28, 2010
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Related Words

coffee drunk

the effect u get after u drank too much coffee to wake yourself up(usually when studying to a test or when u feel u're falling asleep at work,common with workohollics)
Symptoms: Fast reactions,Fuzzy vision,shaking hands,talking to yourself,need more coffee,insomnia for one night at least,neasuea,farts in public,smell of urine from the mouth-----actually all those symptomes r the things u try to prevent by getting "coffee drunk"...
"HHemmm---Benny... why the fuck r u humping your monitor?..and what the fuck is that smell...?"

----awkward silence...-----

"I don't know brow-----I must be coffee drunk!---can u bring me some more coffee,please? i think i'm going out of focus here..."
by Benny D1 May 14, 2007
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Coffee table-ing

The perverse sexual act of defecating onto a glass coffee table whilst someone lies underneath the coffee table to best observe the results
Derek was a huge fan of coffee table-ing
by otter89 July 21, 2009
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irish coffee

Irish Coffee (For One)

Ingredients
1 Measure (3 cl) of Irish Whiskey
1 teaspoon of raw sugar
1 heaped desertspoon of whipped cream
Hot strong coffee to fill the glass

Pre-warm a stemmed glass. Add the whiskey.
Add the sugar and stir in the coffee.
Float the whipped cream on top.
Drink the coffee through the cream (ie do not stir after adding the cream).
Irish Coffee is not for kids.
by joe July 22, 2004
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Coffee Dump

The dump you have to take after you consume a cup of coffee in the morning.
10 minutes after my coffee, I gotta take a coffee dump.
by zefah August 28, 2011
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Cofermed

To get brutally ass raped by a gang of gay transvestites. It might also mean to get a sex-change. Mostly common with queer like names such as gaylord or mike.
Woah mike got cofermed yesterday

That KKK cofermed that young african american
by SPELLIN-B-CHAMPEEOWN May 12, 2009
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