by leroy jenkins June 20, 2006
When you have a sore in the middle of your hand. Either from a blister or a cut, in place where jesus got nailed to the cross.
by thebubbler May 18, 2011
I would like to make sweet sweet love to your show four times a day for the next year and have 5000 little babies running around to keep giving me mad hand... Oh my God that mad, mad hand. Please never go off the air because all the joy will be exhausted from my life and I will probably kill a family of bunny rabbits before turning the shotgun on myself.
by Jenandra May 26, 2008
You have hairy hands! WANKER!
by SweetLoveMaker March 27, 2019
Jam Hands (aka: J H) can be defined as one who cannot avoid keeping their hands free of the most undesirable sticky messes one could possibly accumulate on their hands. Some examples of this are: JAM, chocolate ... anything food related really, also many unmentionables such as their own expectorant. Sometimes they can go days without knowing this and actually amass more of a Jam Hands situation which can spread to other body parts, clothing (pudding shirt) and namely on top of their already jammy hands: this is known as Jam Hands Hoarding.
However, Jam Hands are known for their sharing. They like to mark their territory and think this is amazing, a gesture of unity. However, it is disgusting. Once you have observed a jam hands you will be quick to notice smears or other texturized traces that the Jam Hands leaves behind. You will learn the definition of repulsed.
Friends or observant people who are well aware of when a Jam Hands is in the room, tend to keep a 30 feet minimum distance from the Jam Hands at large and are quick to use public/personal hand sanitizer if available when an accidental/forced encounter with the jam hands or a certain surface that the Jam Hands has touched, has occurred.
However, Jam Hands are known for their sharing. They like to mark their territory and think this is amazing, a gesture of unity. However, it is disgusting. Once you have observed a jam hands you will be quick to notice smears or other texturized traces that the Jam Hands leaves behind. You will learn the definition of repulsed.
Friends or observant people who are well aware of when a Jam Hands is in the room, tend to keep a 30 feet minimum distance from the Jam Hands at large and are quick to use public/personal hand sanitizer if available when an accidental/forced encounter with the jam hands or a certain surface that the Jam Hands has touched, has occurred.
"Daniel, keep your filthy jam hands away from me... oh gross it's in your hair now!"
Example: the kid from your third grade class, that smelt musky, who wore the same shirt every day for 2 weeks, that had 20 different types of chocolate stains on it, and would eat popsicles and the popsicle would melt onto his hands and then fabric fuzz would get stuck to the popsicle mess on his hands, and then he'd have yesterdays gravy on his face and it would be french kiss friday and people would dare you to kiss him and you would slightly vomit at the thought of it in your mouth, and the teacher would dump his desk on clean up monday and grilled cheese sandwiches from 2 months ago would fall out. Jam hands + Jam hands hoarding.
Example: the kid from your third grade class, that smelt musky, who wore the same shirt every day for 2 weeks, that had 20 different types of chocolate stains on it, and would eat popsicles and the popsicle would melt onto his hands and then fabric fuzz would get stuck to the popsicle mess on his hands, and then he'd have yesterdays gravy on his face and it would be french kiss friday and people would dare you to kiss him and you would slightly vomit at the thought of it in your mouth, and the teacher would dump his desk on clean up monday and grilled cheese sandwiches from 2 months ago would fall out. Jam hands + Jam hands hoarding.
by notajamhands March 06, 2011
Last year at EDC this group of girls called me over to join their hand orgy. Then one stuck a lotion-drenched hand down my pants
by Mufassa69 July 21, 2010
by xaneks November 17, 2016