Beard Madness

A short-lived surge of itch, prickling, and irritability that hits about 24–48 hours after a close shave, as stiff regrowing stubble and freshly sensitized skin team up to drive you into a slight frenzy. Typically lasts 1–4 days.

“Day-two Beard Madness has me wanting to claw my face off.”

by TwistedBobbay August 29, 2025

The Bearded Chin Wonder

A fury man-ape with a beard that connects to his ponytail to form a lions mane. He is known to hide shatter covered blunts in his hair to avoid detection while sneaking into concerts.

Oooohh shit its Ilian the motha fucking Bearded Chin Wonder!!!

Loc-"Who's bringing the beers?"
Me-"The Bearded Chin Wonder"

by Ebonizzle September 29, 2017

release beard

A beard specifically grown in preparation for getting difficult/large-scale software features live.

I've been growing this release beard in preparation for our big 1.1 release next week. I'll shave it afterward.

by E money D December 21, 2017

Shave Your Beard

To tell someone off over something pointless or ridiculous. Used when your friend is rambling about something that isn’t even your business and you just have to get him to shut the fuck up.

Ron: Yo bro! I talked to that Adrianna girl in school today. She’ll be my prom date! Isn’t this so ex-

Peter: Shave your beard, Ron.

Ron: What?

Peter: I said shave your beard Ron!

by IAmTheOneWhoShits December 9, 2024

race beard

A token BIPoc person you are friends with so you don't appear racist.

See also: queer beard

"We need more diversity in our friend group. Shall we invite Steve?"
"Steve? Oh, you mean the black Steve!"
" Dudes, Steve knows you're using him as a race beard, eh."

by secretuser420 May 7, 2022

Green Beard Altruism

Greenbeard altruism is a fascinating concept in evolutionary biology that attempts to explain the evolution of altruistic behavior. It proposes that a single gene (or a set of tightly linked genes) can be responsible for three distinct traits: a noticeable signal or "tag" (like a green beard), recognition of that signal in others, and altruistic behavior directed towards those with the same signal. This allows individuals to selectively cooperate with others who share the same gene, even if they are not related. 1 While the "green beard" example is hypothetical, there are real-world examples of this phenomenon in various organisms, highlighting the potential for cooperation to arise through mechanisms beyond kin selection.

Green beard altruism, while theoretically possible, is rarely observed in nature due to the complex requirements of a single gene controlling the signal, recognition, and altruistic behavior.

by The Counterintuitive Words February 10, 2025

Beard-on

The state of arousal from the discussion, growth, touching or appearance of a beard or beards.

Did you check out Steve's facial hair lately? Handsome as fuck.

Yeah man, I got a total beard-on.

by despicable-al March 24, 2021