Toddler

All the iPad babies who think they’re sigma males

Person 1: I’m such a sigma male
Person 2: bro is def a toddler watching to much YouTube shorts

by Pretty_bored July 13, 2024

Toddler

Used to refer to a male of interest to a cougar or interested in a Cougar.

The toddler is to scared to pull the trigger to go day drinking.

Think I might as well break down my age barrier for dating and give a toddler a try because my & and older have issues.

by THERULEY73 April 20, 2025

Toddler Lunch

A chaotic, strangely endearing meal that looks like it was curated by a tiny drunk person with no concept of food groups. Typically includes 3–7 unrelated items such as four Goldfish crackers, half a string cheese, two grapes (one already bitten), a cold hot dog, a pancake with no syrup, and something suspiciously wet. Bonus points if it’s served on a plastic plate shaped like a dinosaur or unicorn.

“I forgot to pack lunch so I just raided the fridge and now I’m eating a full toddler lunch at my desk like a gremlin.”

by Biofuel-Et April 22, 2025

Toddlerism

A word or sentence, said by a toddler or small child, that is either mispronounced or outlandishly incorrect.
Examples include: elevator=alligator, stegosaurus=stickysaurus, tornado=tomato, periodic table=pee on the table, and star wars=saw horse.

My son said a hilarious toddlerism yesterday. He called a concrete mixer a commie! mixer

by YummyTerror8259 August 22, 2023

toddler

a little shit that likes to drink bleach
(suicidal shit stains)

"That toddler just ate a whole bunch of pillow stuffing!!"

by hobowithashotty September 7, 2023

Crime Toddler

Crime Toddlers, also known as Crime Babys, are juvenile criminals, usually under the age of six. Any age above is denominated as a Crime Teenager.

"Where the FECK are our Kit Kats?"

"A buncha Crime Toddlers stole them. We'll order some more"

NOTE: Crime Toddler/Crime Baby is ALWAYS capitalized. Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES must the Crime Toddlers/Babies be uncapitalized

by I JUST WANT A NAME MY GOD September 26, 2023

Toddler slap

A male on male sex act. Most often preformed in the doggey position. The person at the back grabs the person's at the fronts child, still an infant by the legs and proceeds to donkey punch the person at the fronts head with the infant.

Hey did you hear Mike's not a did any more?
What?
Yeah Gaza was pumping him up the ass and toddler slapped him so hard he broke little John's skull.

by Toddler slap June 30, 2023