by TheRealModernDayShakespeare281 March 30, 2022
Get the Jesus queef mug.Some dude that has sex with a lot of women and impregnated all of them then leaves them with the gift of a fatherless child. He also does birthday parties.
“Hey have you heard of the sex jesus?”
“Yea I have that’s my dad.”
“I heard he’s the dad of 1/23 of the planet”
“Yea I have that’s my dad.”
“I heard he’s the dad of 1/23 of the planet”
by Havesafesex April 14, 2022
Get the Sex jesus mug."hook and loop" straps (note: the originals are known as "velcro")
these straps contain and manage cords, cables, ropes...e.t.c. , keeping them from catching on anything and everything,
or transforming themselves into a tangled mass! (or wrapping themselves around "the baby's" NECK !!)
the natural law is: when carrying ANYTHING (like a tv) the dangling cord will catch itself solidly on something, where one has to 'break stride' to get it free. this would NEVER happen in 5,000 tries at throwing the cord at the offending catch point! it ONLY catches when carrying something unsecured!
these straps contain and manage cords, cables, ropes...e.t.c. , keeping them from catching on anything and everything,
or transforming themselves into a tangled mass! (or wrapping themselves around "the baby's" NECK !!)
the natural law is: when carrying ANYTHING (like a tv) the dangling cord will catch itself solidly on something, where one has to 'break stride' to get it free. this would NEVER happen in 5,000 tries at throwing the cord at the offending catch point! it ONLY catches when carrying something unsecured!
be right with you! , godda find a way to contain this cord! (response:) try this Jesus strap !
when setting up the PA, the previously attached Jesus straps saved my black ass !
what kind of idiot doesn't secure a cord ?? -Jesus straps your savior, infant!
when setting up the PA, the previously attached Jesus straps saved my black ass !
what kind of idiot doesn't secure a cord ?? -Jesus straps your savior, infant!
by michael foolsley April 14, 2022
Get the Jesus straps mug.by Oliver_garden) April 21, 2022
Get the Blond Jesus mug.The act of calling your partner a biblical figure such as Jesus while they knosh on your banana (penis).
"I heard Marcus lost his virginity last night, but I also heard him screaming Jesus, what was that about?"
"Oh, don't worry, he was just getting the banana Jesus".
"Oh, don't worry, he was just getting the banana Jesus".
by Hallistic Vocal Roach March 28, 2022
Get the banana Jesus mug.A very short person who never brushes there hair and has a serious anger problem and thinks me big brain
by Big brain man February 17, 2022
Get the jesus gomez mug.by the-great-jet December 1, 2021
Get the zoidberg Jesus mug.