Shipwreck tits

The kind of very saggy tits you'd want with you if you ever got shipwrecked and stranded on a deserted island. If you tie them together in the middle by the nipples you can make an impromptu hammock allowing you to doze away comfortably up off of the ground where coconut crabs might otherwise bite you in your sleep.

"Karen listen, I'm pleased you were the only other survivor of that shipwreck. If it weren't for you and the fact that I could make a nice swinging hammock out of your shipwreck tits, I would have been painfully bitten by a coconut or spider crab in my sleep. You're still here? I thought I told you to scavenge around the island and look for ingredients that would make a suitable sandwich. I thought I saw some lettuce growing in a patch on that mountainside. I don't want any of that on my sandwich. I killed a parrot yesterday, here see what you can do with this."

by Showdown Sean November 6, 2011

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Sauce tits

An udder-like contraption that dispenses various sauces and other condiments, including tomato sauce (ketchup), BBQ sauce and mustard. The sauce is dispensed by "milking" it out onto the food. Commonly used in Sweden and possibly other Scandinavian countries.

(you, to the maccas girl behind the counter): "yo, my fries are way too bland and dry on their own, where's the sauce at?"

(maccas girl): "right over there on the counter, just help yourself using the sauce tits."

(you): "what a wonderful idea, i can help myself to a range of delicious sauces while also practising my udder milking technique"

by simple_si October 5, 2011

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