mountaineer baptism

A Mountaineer Baptism is when an Appalachian State University fan plunges themselves into the waters of the Duck Pond, which contain high levels of bird's fecal matter and urine. This usually will take place after a big sporting event win. Those who undergo a mountaineer baptism usually contract chlamydia from the birds via the water.

After the Miracle on the Mountain (AppState winning the football game at the last second), the drunk students stormed the field and underwent a Mountaineer Baptism down at the Duck Pond.

by ralphbuchinski September 18, 2022

St. John the Baptist

This is the most treacherous school I have seen in my 47 years of living. I sent my kids here for a year and I am already in debt 30,000 dollars. My kids are 4th graders and came home and they stink of the cafeteria and gym. Their feet especially stink band they now have fungus in between their toes. They need to do hygiene protocols. Their penny loafers are demolished after playing in the parking lot. A PARKING LOT!!! My kid almost got ran over by a mini truck. He is now traumatized and mentions it when we go to the family therapist weekly. They need to do hygiene protocols. My kids penny loafers are demolished after playing in the parking lot. A PARKING LOT!! My kid almost got ran over by a mini truck. He now mentions it when we go to the family therapist weekly. They are taught that premarital pregnancy is a sin. Me and my hunky (FIFTH) cousin/husband had our first child at 14 years old. Ever since then, we now have 7.5 kids and are living in a BEAUTIFUL trailer. So are we going to hell???? HUH?!?! DON’T SEND YOUR KIDS HERE. ZERO STARS. ZERO.

“St.John the Baptist gives your kids foot fungus and obesity.”

“I sent my kid to St. John the Baptist and are now in debt by 40,000 dollars.”

by alphasubmissivemale August 30, 2022

landover baptist

A false internet-based church dedicated to exposing a side of christianity most do not know.

Landover Baptist does not welcome those who are not saved

by Falconrath August 13, 2003

Baptist

A member of one of several hundred Christian denominations who all agree that the the Bible is the literal word of God, but don't agree with each other. See fundamentalist, fucktard

Q. What religion are you, Reformed Baptist?
A. No, they're going to Hell(tm). I'm a Sovergn Grace Baptist.

by Cuntoleezza Rice November 10, 2006

Southern Baptist

The most hypocrtical and narrow minded religion in the United States, and possibly the world. Not only is it bad enough they are Protestant, they bash everyone who is not of their church and condemn everybody to hell, including Gays, non Christians, and even other Christians like Roman Catholics and Greek/Russian Orthodox members. They are in company with the likes of Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson--they are the epitome of hypocrisy.

Jerry Falwell said 9/11 was America's fault because of gays.

by Jo Jo February 3, 2005

florida baptism

The act of dropping a baby on its head in a WalMart. Ensures another generation of Floridians will flourish in the great state.

Joleenda was shopping at WalMart, and her newborn baby, MacKristalle, got its Florida baptism when it fell head-first out of her unattended shopping cart.

by TheKinkoses December 18, 2009

Landover Baptist

A fantastic parody site that pokes fun at ultra-conservative fundamentalist Christians.

Recent articles include "The Pope's Message From Hell" and "Inside the Sick Mind of George Lucas."

Hilarious, but also disturbing due to the fact that there are people out there who would probably wholeheartedly agree with the majority of the material on this site.

http://www.landoverbaptist.org/

Francis bought a "Love Me or Burn!" Jesus button from the Landover Baptist Store.

by camry July 16, 2008