christmas

(n.) A magical time of year where Jesus Christ rises from the grave to feast on the flesh of the living, so we all sing Christmas carols to lull him back to sleep.

Johnny celebrates Christmas with his family by singing Christmas carols to ward off Zombie Jesus.

by Jerrodimus Prime December 16, 2004

christmas

Once a definition for a sacred holiday celebrating the birth of baby Jesus. Now a modern slang term for capitalists raping your wallet while you waste all of your money on people you hate.

Once again Christmas has left my wallet and desire for sex with a woman in an elf suit empty.

by DJ December 24, 2003

christmas

A boost in the economy...at the very least

check out the christmas sales

by natalie89 December 28, 2005

christmas

The only day I am a christian.

I never go to church but I sure as heck celabrate christmas.

by Chickenwings21 October 4, 2006

christmas

December 25, the day Jesus Christ's birth is celebrated. It is most likely not Christ's actual date of birth, but was probably chosen to supplant a pagan Roman holiday of the same date when the Roman Empire under Constantine converted to Christianity. This definition is way too wordy for this site.

Man, this Christmas shindig beats out Sacrificing Some More Goats To Jupiter Day hands down!

by FaceofEvil6 January 9, 2004

christmas

A debased Christian festive day, an over-commercialized time of quiet desperation, but a time of supposed good-will to our fellow man. 'Cause being kind once a year is better than never at all.

"Can I give money to the Sally-Ann,Mum" "Yes, dear, after all it's Christmas." "Let's give to the Foodbank, after all, it's Christmas" "Should we invite poor lonely Kevin?" "Sure, it's only once a year."

by Canuckkitty September 15, 2005

Is not Christmas

An annoying, nightmare-fueled, ear-destroying YouTube Video made by Sr Pelo. Part of his series, The Mokey show

Plot: Mokey is sleeping. Mokey is woken up by Momi. Momi fucking kills Mokey 15 times

Transcript excerpt:

Mokey: mmmm.....AHHHHOOOOOOOOMMMaaammm. (dirty dream)

Momi: ITSNOTKRIMAAAAAA!!

slaps mokey gets slaped

Momi: ITS NOT KRIMAS!!!

Shakes Mousd table

Mokey: WHAT??? WHAT DO YOU WANT!!??

Momi: WHAT IT IS MOKEY?

(mokey gets chokes sexually)

Momi: That's right, ITSNOTKRISMAH!

"Bro, If you show me Is not Christmas again, I will slap your nuts!"

by Le Carrot boi February 10, 2021