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Prison Wank

Exactly what it says on the tin. To masturbate whilst in prison.
Most criminals enjoy a good prison wank.
by TheFunnyGuy88 June 29, 2022
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choke wank

Wanking while choking yourself, being choked by someone else while you wank or being choked by someone else while they wank you
Im going to have the best choke wank tonight
by shukkka November 16, 2016
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Wank ear

The heightened sense of hearing a young man develops when he masturbate in a house with other people. Despite masturbating he intensely listens for anybody approaching his location so he has ample time to hide his penis, clean up his immediate environment, and maybe hide any pornography he might be using.
Aw man, since moving back home I had to sharpen up my wank ear.

My wife doesn't knock when I shower, better use my wank ear when I rub one out.
by munky82 December 13, 2017
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wank walk

When you walk with both hands in your pockets and leaned back due to the weight of the greasy pony tail
Bryan walked past me while doing the wank walk
by Srdjan69 October 19, 2020
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muppet wank

During coitus, one partner (or a third person) inserts their full hand into the anus of the woman and grasps the man's penis through the walls of the rectum and vagina. They then proceed to masturbate the penis while simultaneously fisting the woman rectally.
Dude, I got muppet wanked by my girlfriends BFF during a threesome last night.
by Inoffensive_Account August 20, 2016
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wanking about

To engage in dickish behavior. Used in the same spirit as "to fuck about", "fuck around", or "screw around".
We would have gotten here much faster if so many other drivers weren't wanking about the whole time.
by Not Dangerous Dickey November 19, 2015
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Crab-Wank

To squat down on your toes, reaching under the leg to masturbate in a downward motion.
Common sport amongst contractors working away from home. Of an evening, should they be feeling frisky and risky, they may strip off, carefully climb up on to the B&B’s sink rim, tiptoes on the unsupported edge. Whilst in this expert position he may decide to crab-wank one out whist his face/eye is pressed against the mirror, eyeballing himself until completion.
Martin: How was your evening Andy?
Andy: Pretty tragic really.
Martin: But I thought you had your night planned? Kebab and a crab-wank you said??
Andy: The kebab was great and I was after a thrill before bed.
Martin: What’s tragic about that? Did you manage the expert?
Andy: Almost, but the sink came off the wall and I couldn’t finish.
Martin: Still, better than Steve last year, his sink shattered and cut his femoral artery.

Andy: Hummnn, I may go back to the floor for a bit…
by Goatboy Grasshead June 8, 2021
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