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muffin hands

A terrible affliction affecting a percentage of the public who are characterized by hands made of muffins. However, this malady is only compounded by the additional fact that the person possessing the hands are forbidden to eat their own hands in cases of extreme hunger.
(Note: Although this condition has not been witnessed in the medical field, the term could apply to someone with deformed hands or one who cannot use their hands properly)
I don't know how Dr. Schmidt is able to function in everyday society with such a terrible case of muffin hands.
by Remulus March 9, 2009
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Handsie

A cute slang word for a hand job.
How to give a Handsie:

1. Place one or two hands on the penis.

2. Rub, with variable speed.

3. Add a ball tickle for fun.
by Twizling July 28, 2012
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Jazz hands

The act of waving one's hands in the air in an eratic manner in response to an emotional song or situation. Similar to spirit fingers except that the entire hand and, ocaisionally, the arms, are utilized.
While listening to the Journey power ballad "Faithfully" John broke out the jazz hands.
by Daddy's home August 15, 2009
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colt 45 hands

When one duct-tapes a colt 45 onto each hand. The person who has "colt 45 hands" cannot take them off until he/she finishes the bottle. Very difficult to pee, very easy to get drunk.
I can't fuckin take a leak till i drink my colt 45 hands!
by Jared Hunter March 24, 2005
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no hands facial

The act of ejaculating on a ho after some good sex. U must be skilled however, because the act of skeeting is handless and totally unexpected to the ho.
I gave that slut a no hands facial to top it off and she didn't even see it coming. It was swell
by Meatball April 18, 2005
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Romanian handshake

To perform fellatio or cunnilingus in an effort to secure favors or favorable treatment.
"Did you see the gymnastics judging? Somebody must've been doing the old Romanian handshake to get the scores that high."
by Vlad the Impaler August 25, 2004
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Handsome Jon

An extremely handsome male who stands above the rest and is called John or Jon, therefore making them handsome Jon
Wow, look at that guy Jon, hes so handsome, its handsome Jon
by TG:83 September 24, 2004
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