Charlotte: haiuhlssisghj
Shirley: wth?
Charlotte: suygkhjdipdugvciuyhifgvcgiufgh
Shirley: Charlotte, I-
Charlotte: SIYXLKUHIUHKGUODHGJVIUHDB DHODHJVHUODHJVHDUHVDHU
Shirley and Alpen: YOU NEED JESUS!
Charlotte: wha?
Shirley: *SLAPS THE FUCKING BIBLE AGAINST CHARLOTTE'S FACE*
Shirley: wth?
Charlotte: suygkhjdipdugvciuyhifgvcgiufgh
Shirley: Charlotte, I-
Charlotte: SIYXLKUHIUHKGUODHGJVIUHDB DHODHJVHUODHJVHDUHVDHU
Shirley and Alpen: YOU NEED JESUS!
Charlotte: wha?
Shirley: *SLAPS THE FUCKING BIBLE AGAINST CHARLOTTE'S FACE*
by *cough* hello July 3, 2019
Get the You need Jesus! mug.by SoBsubsidiary> August 24, 2022
Get the jesus christ mug.Related Words
Jessus
• Jessusa
• Jessussy
• taco Jessus
• Jessi/Jessussy
• jesus
• Jesus Christ
• Jesus freak
• jesus h christ
• Jesus Juice
A bearded tramp. 'Jimmy' cos that's usually their name and 'Jesus' cos of the resemblance in the facial hair department.
by Mummy Shaz July 18, 2005
Get the Jimmy Jesus mug.I haven't read the Bible, but here's what I've deduced about Jesus from watching Fox News:
1.) Jesus is a die-hard Republican. He spends a lot of his time reading books by Ann Coulter and appearing at fundraisers for groups like Focus on the Family.
2.) Jesus was among the earliest proponents for the invasion of Iraq, and even today He sees the deaths of tens of thousands of innocent civilians as a necessary price to pay for installing a western-style democracy in Iraq.
3.) Jesus is an outspoken proponent of supply-side economics, which favor tax cuts to the wealthy. He's also a huge fan of Ronald Reagan.
4.) Jesus thinks that poor people are poor because they are lazy.
5.) Jesus is appalled by same-sex marriage. He thinks that straight people who hate each other have more of a right to be married than two gay people who love each other. Jesus strongly feels that a person's sexuality is a matter of choice.
6.) Jesus does not believe that global warming is caused by humans. He also thinks that intelligent design should be taught in science classes.
7.) Jesus supports capital punishment, and that's why He desperately wanted George W. Bush to be president, and He couldn't be more pleased with how the Bush Administration turned out.
8.) Jesus never misses the O'Reilly factor. And He absolutely hates the Colbert Report.
9). Jesus is radically opposed to a provision of health care to all citizens. He thinks it would lead to a welfare state.
10. And finally, Jesus is really upset that Barack Obama won the 2008 election. He has decided that a second coming will be necessary, and He will rapture people into the heavens on the basis of their party affiliations and campaign contributions.
1.) Jesus is a die-hard Republican. He spends a lot of his time reading books by Ann Coulter and appearing at fundraisers for groups like Focus on the Family.
2.) Jesus was among the earliest proponents for the invasion of Iraq, and even today He sees the deaths of tens of thousands of innocent civilians as a necessary price to pay for installing a western-style democracy in Iraq.
3.) Jesus is an outspoken proponent of supply-side economics, which favor tax cuts to the wealthy. He's also a huge fan of Ronald Reagan.
4.) Jesus thinks that poor people are poor because they are lazy.
5.) Jesus is appalled by same-sex marriage. He thinks that straight people who hate each other have more of a right to be married than two gay people who love each other. Jesus strongly feels that a person's sexuality is a matter of choice.
6.) Jesus does not believe that global warming is caused by humans. He also thinks that intelligent design should be taught in science classes.
7.) Jesus supports capital punishment, and that's why He desperately wanted George W. Bush to be president, and He couldn't be more pleased with how the Bush Administration turned out.
8.) Jesus never misses the O'Reilly factor. And He absolutely hates the Colbert Report.
9). Jesus is radically opposed to a provision of health care to all citizens. He thinks it would lead to a welfare state.
10. And finally, Jesus is really upset that Barack Obama won the 2008 election. He has decided that a second coming will be necessary, and He will rapture people into the heavens on the basis of their party affiliations and campaign contributions.
by Jack Torrance-Overlook Hotel January 10, 2009
Get the Jesus mug.Jesus Christ is a fictional character.
Associated with The Bibles(A Fictional Storybook) and Christianity.
Associated with The Bibles(A Fictional Storybook) and Christianity.
by Doomester December 26, 2018
Get the Jesus Christ mug.Neo had many previous versions of himself;many "ones." So did Jesus. One of them was a dinosaur. Probably.
by hoifer June 16, 2003
Get the dinosaur jesus mug.An expression of great misfortune, disgust, or suprise. Normally used in the most extreme of circumstances.
See:
Jesus H. Christ
Jesus Tapdancing Christ
Jesus Brick-Shitting Christ
etc...
See:
Jesus H. Christ
Jesus Tapdancing Christ
Jesus Brick-Shitting Christ
etc...
Jesus Breakdancing Christ! My scrotum is missing! How the hell did that happen!??!?!?!!
or...
Guy 1: Hey, I banged your wife last night.
Guy 2: Jesus Breakdancing Christ! Your ass is grass, motherfucker!
or...
Guy 1: Hey, I banged your wife last night.
Guy 2: Jesus Breakdancing Christ! Your ass is grass, motherfucker!
by Mister Joiter October 7, 2007
Get the Jesus Breakdancing Christ mug.