clapping the ham

Yet another phrase which relates to the act of masturbation, named after the great man clapham

he spent all afternoon "clapping the ham"

by clappy van winkle April 10, 2003

fine ham abounds

When ham is flavorful, juicy, and well prepared the universal truth is that it's fucking good ham. "Fine ham abounds" can be substituted for "fucking good ham" in polite company.

Yeah I like it, it's really fucking good. Ooh, oops, I mean--fine ham abounds, mom.

by mootinator January 3, 2013

ham and egger

An agricultural term used to describe a livestock facility in which pigs (porcus fattae) and chickens (poultus eggae) are raised in close quarters, often resulting in symbiosis between the two animal species.

"much to his consternation, farmer boggs awoke at the crack of dawn for the fifth consecutive morning to a cacophone of cocks' crows and fevered oinking."

by valid id twin November 9, 2003

Honey ham farmer

A honey ham farmer is one who grooms sexual relationships with the obese.

Douglas flirted and fawned over the plump until he was called the honey ham farmer.

by I, Wreckerrr October 10, 2016

Going Ham And Cheese

Going Hard As A Motherfucker BUT with cheese

Damn that Boy was going ham and cheese in the game.

by $$$overboobies May 1, 2011

ham-fisted

The state of having been rectally or vaginally penetrated by a solid and salty pork product.

Ham-fisted: Sodomized by a Virginia ham. Raped by a prosciutto. Bacon throat.

by Gaspor Porcine January 7, 2012

A bag a deli ham

A well-used and multi-layered vagina that when viewed from a second person perspective resembles the appearance of a large bag of medium sliced deli ham.

Oh Yeah! feels just like a bag a deli ham.

Holy Nazi-Cock FUCK! I almost threw up when I saw that she had a bag a deli ham!

What the fuck? that bag a deli ham looks like she is giving birth to a Shar Pei.

by Brovert December 14, 2012