Chronic Texting

When a person is so enthralled in their texting/ phone capabilities, they act as if they have smoked a pinch of chronic. Symptoms include, not responding to simple questions, not being able to walk, sleepy eyes, no care for the outside world, basically unable to perform any basic function that does not involve their phone. Sometimes they even start laughing for no apparent reason as if they are chronic high.

Hey Joe, want to go to the mall?" *no response or movement "Joe! come on man lets go!" *stares and laughs at phone "You just aren't the same when you are chronic texting"

by lukepatty317 November 26, 2010

Texas Roulette

A dangerous game of chance. Someone who has intestinal gas and the feeling that they may also have a bad case of diarrhea will fart to relieve the pressure. With each fart, the potential for a shart becomes greater and greater. A person loses Texas Roulette by attempting to fart and instead shitting themselves.

I could feel my stomach gurgling as I walked back to the hotel. There must have been something wrong with the curry. The pressure was unbearable. I had to relieve the gas. I decided to play Texas Roulette and the first few farts escaped with no problem. But then, just as I relaxed to fart again, I splattershat my undies.

by kellermeister May 8, 2010

Toilet Texting

When texting is done on the toilet.

"He sent me 20 texts today which is odd. He hardly ever texts and said he had the runs."
"I think he was toilet texting you."
"Gross!"

by Brett Burkhardt May 12, 2008

text timing

the art of skilfully timing your texts when talking to someone you like to make them seem like you're not obsessed but you still like them

boy: hey
(15 minutes later)
girl: hey, what's up
(no pause)
boy: nothing much, you?

girl to friend: yo, just used awesome text timing on johnny and now we're text buddies.

by 19sixtyninee September 5, 2009

texpert

Person with lots of book learning but little practical experience or knowledge. A pedant.

From the Beatles' song "I Am the Walrus".

"Expert, texpert, choking smoker, don't you hear the joker laugh at you?"

by Jasper Ferg March 20, 2011

"I love you" texting

Created by MLIAers (Mylifeisaverage.com), the "I love you" texting fad swept across the nation. With people texting random numbers saying, "I love you," MLIA became a love-spreading mini-phenomenon. And although the MLIAers were sending out a kind message, a lot of receivers complained and threatened to call the authorities. With the creators of MLIA getting email after email of complaints of the site users sending anonymous texts, this fun hobby became a big problem. Eventually, Mylifeisaverage.com created a page about the dangers of texting people you don't know, and soon after that, the "I love you" texts decreased significantly.

But although the texting has subsided, a simple "I love you" is known throughout the world by the users of MLIA.

Person One: "Have you heard about the '"I love you" texting? Supposedly a bunch of people are sending out random texts telling people they love them."
Person Two: "Man, I want an 'I love you' text."

Person Three: "I love you!"
Person Four: "My life is average."

by Grrzzlygrrl August 18, 2009

textual

To speak intimately sexual with your partner or cyber soulmate online, or in a text message. Either online with an instant messenger, or using a text message system on your cell phone or Blackberry, etc.

Email can be very exciting, but it is not as textual as a session on Yahoo with your cyber soulmate.

by syber_satyr January 25, 2005