turd trapeze

The act of laying toilet paper across a toilet as to cover the entire opening, putting the seat down to assure the paper stays put, and shitting on top of the paper to give the appearance that the toilet is supremely clogged and strikes fear into anyone who would dare to flush it. It's called the trapeze because the turd is skillfully balanced like a trapeze high artist.

What the hell, Carlos you clogged our toilet!

Wait nevermind, it was just a turd trapeze.

by Slate Giz February 16, 2010

turd-licker

A person who uses excessive behavior to be considered for a job or promotion. Most serious and next in the series : brown-noser then ass-kisser then turd-licker.

My efforts of getting the promotion by being a brown-noser as well as an ass-kisser to the boss were outmatched by the actions of the turd-licker in our organization.

by MWBishop July 1, 2010

turd magnet

One who brings around shady, untrusted individuals; one who magnetizes to such low life scum; One who is always around an unwanted crowd of turds; A real turd magnet.

Frank: "Why do those guys keep coming around? Their fucking douchebags."

Mike: "Those are my friends"

Frank: "Your a fucking turd magnet"

by Oldschool22 January 5, 2012

Turd knocker

1) A fart that is ushering the way for a solid drop.
2) A term of endearment used by the elderly generation.

You little turd knockers behave while I'm gone, and I'll bring you some ice cream.

by Æl November 5, 2014

cunt turd

Derogatory term for a baby.

She sure got fat after she shat out that screaming little cunt turd.

by DCmikedc November 25, 2007

frozen turd dildo.

take a steamy dump in a condom. freeze it. and then stick er in the cunt. also known as "the lumpy lad"

frozen turd dildo.

by SDCARR February 14, 2012

Turd Flower

Nickname for Karl Rove (that overweight Sith lord that advises W) coined by George Bush; it was leaked to the media which caused some embarrassment to Rove.

Turd Flower might be the most brilliant political strategist in US history, but he is also a pasty, overweight criminal.

by asdfw June 14, 2006