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Concrete Dildo

Despite the energy and resources spent to create it, it's not even worth the time to practically use it
"Hey! Did you see the new JC Penny's they just built?"
"Didn't they go bankrupt?"
"Exactly! Another concrete dildo for the neighborhood!"
by blackwolfhell March 4, 2022
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Dildo

A toy dick that people stick up their coochie… 😎
Women: that dildo is SO big…. Bigger than my husbands wee wee😩
by Robloxain August 15, 2021
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Carpet-dildo

"Last night Johnny got carpet-dildo what a loser"
by Mudonna August 23, 2021
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Dildo hammer

That guy at work who strokes another guy's ego when he fucks up beyond explanation.
Ole dildo hammer is feeding Gary a line because he crashed the crane and can't fucking deal!
by Boceefus June 18, 2021
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Dildo Nick

A man who talks about dildos
Dildo Nick really brought it up
by HG99 May 15, 2021
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Dildo Baggins

Look! There's Dildo Baggins.
by Rinocicornicus May 16, 2021
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Funeral dildo

A communal sex toy (frequently a family heirloom) used to alleviate grief in times of mourning.
Aunt Enya stood by her husband's casket, tears cascading down her grief-stricken face as the wails of the women in the family filled the room. The air was heavy with sorrow, the weight of loss palpable in the mournful atmosphere.

Amidst the sorrow, a whispered secret emerged, passed down through generations - the ancient family "funeral dildo." Shock and disbelief clouded Enya's eyes as the women, consumed by grief, revealed the taboo object. In their shared pain, they sought solace in the forbidden comfort it offered.

One by one, the women took turns, finding a bittersweet release in their shared act of defiance against death's cruel grip. Enya watched, her heart heavy with a mix of shock and understanding. Even Nana Val, her frail body confined to a Victorian wheelchair, found temporary respite from her own suffering. As the night wore on, the echoes of grief softened, replaced by a fragile sense of peace.

In that moment, amongst the tears and whispered confessions, Aunt Enya found a glimmer of hope in the midst of her despair. The mourning dildo, with its taboo allure, had woven a strange tapestry of healing through the tangled threads of grief, binding the women together in a shared, sacred moment of release.
by sad grandma November 22, 2024
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