Panda

The most retarded animal that ever walked this earth. Due to its size it should eat things like a horse made of chocolate and whey powder, but instead it decides to eat the least nutritious food that exists: bamboo. Because of this low nutrition a panda needs to eat around 500 stems each day which takes up all the time they spend being awake. The rest of the time they sleep.

They are almost extinct is for three reasons:
1. When the bamboo in the area they reside runs out, they are too lazy to move their fat asses anywhere else
2. They do not fornicate. But how can you blame them when they spend their entire day eating
3. Natural selection

They are not yet extinct for two correlated reasons:
1. They look ‘cute’
2. Human stupidity

I hereby nominate the entire panda species for the Darwin Award.
Panda A: I'm Hungry
Panda B: Yeah, me too

SPOILER:
They die
by Binque April 03, 2014
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Panda

A holy and sacred animal put on this earth so that we would be happy. They sit on their butts most of the day eating bamboo like in the picture below . However, these sacred animals population is decreasing and they are on the verge of extinction. We have to save these pandas so we can forever admire their cuteness or else they One True Panda God will unleash his wrath.
Panda UwU
by Bitkrin November 22, 2019
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Panda

Is that a figurine of my glorious king Panda??
by Schizo!?!? November 23, 2024
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Panda

Someone who has inappropriate relationships with dogs. Derived from MGS Student Angus Burston who had s3x with his pet dog panda.
"Did you hear about Bursto??"
"Yeah what the hell, he screwed his dog panda."

"Angus Burston is such a panda!"
by James Roche June 20, 2022
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Panda

A kid that grew up during the pandemic and is socially awkward.
“She’s so awkward
It’s because she’s a panda
by rach99706 January 15, 2023
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Panda

by Hgddghu February 10, 2019
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Panda

Sexy girl thats mixed.
only Mixed girls that are mixed with the races black and white.
"You know that sexy ass panda who works at the club?" "The beautiful mixed bartender, deasia? Yeahhh cuz she a panda for sure, perfect mix of black n white,mmm!"
by porschebeanna April 30, 2016
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