Marine Wank

The act of masturbation in a semi-aquatic territory.

Open to both genders, a marine wank is most commonly (but certainly not exclusively) performed in the bath.
It is reserved for only the most progressive of wankers, the true cream of the crop. Those with a real appetite for their own genetalia.

Other more uncommon places to marine wank include public swimming pools, lidos, paddling pools*, ponds and lakes.

There are unconfirmed tales of people becoming addicted to marine masturbation. It is reported that people have become so desperate, they've been filling up sinks and dipping in their genitalia for a quick fix.

* please be noted that it is considered poor etiquette to marine wank in a paddling pool while children are present. You WILL go to jail, you dirty bastard.

Pal, I'm gagging for a marine wank. I might just dangle my balls in the sink for ease. It's a bit long having to run an entire bath at this time of night.
masturbate wank wanker

by PeadophileJenkins2 May 13, 2016

Wasted Wank

The realisation that your child is a fuckwit and you would rather of just had a wank that night.

Oh for fuck sake Jason get your head out of the railings. You really are a wasted wank.

by PhilMiddy June 7, 2016

weenie wank

Someone who is a mean person, often being rude. They are disrespectful and can't control it.

"Hey man! Don't invite him, he's a weenie wank!"

by ChickenBlueCat January 7, 2017

glitter wank

predominantely British term for a celebrated masturbation

what is marcus doing tonight... nothing he got him self some scented candles and is having a glitter wank.

by AGJ13 February 12, 2017

depressed wank

After experiencing a sad moment in your life and you try to cheer yourself up by having a wank but you get no pleasure out of it

My mum just died and I have been wanking for ten hours now and it doesn't even feel good, I just want to feel something. I wish I wasn't having a depressed wank

by Dictionaryvision April 18, 2017

weeping wank

Wanking someone off till they cry, or wanking yourself till you cry

Jeff felt so emotional that he had himself a weeping wank

by Rainbowmaid321 June 10, 2017

Tongue Wank

A tongue wank is when you get the tightest of pussies and you tongue them and you actually stick your tongue up the pussy and it feels like a wank but on your tongue.

Most commonly used in the town of Papamoa in the North island of New Zealand and Westport in the South island of New Zealand

"That guy next door he gave me a tongue wank it felt so good" or

"Wow Regan is such a Chinese tongue wank"

by n8frompap January 3, 2018