A depraved sex act that is not clearly understood outside of the province of Manitoba. What is known is it involves a case of Labatt Blue, a short stool, and some sort of animal pelt (usually deer, but bear is also common). Despite its popularity, it remains one of the leading causes of death in rural Canada.
by Canadaphiler March 26, 2010
Get the Manitoba Snowblower mug.A very small town of about 1,500 people about 45 minutes from Peoria,IL. It is considered a hicktown because of it's very historic feel to it. There are about 4 places to eat including a Subway and three restaurants, 2 gas stations and a police station. There typically is nothing to do in this small-ass town so most teenagers cruise or find places to sit.
Dude i went to Manito this weekend and drove around for about 5 hours total it was boring as hell man.
by manitooober April 22, 2009
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Of course Manitoba is essentially the French Dakota. And everyone knows that the Dakotas are home to some of the most sexually depraved humans this side of Bixby. Armed with that as background information, the Manitoba Monkey Wrench is the utensil that is found in every man’s tackle box, toolbox and utility belt. It is the very tool that can keep you alive on those subarctic nights in the local pub.
Now might be a good time for an illustrative story. Once there was a logger that frequented the long and lonesome roads between Winnipeg and Dauphin. While he has no doubt dipped his quill into the ink of every truck stop, rest stop and out-house prostitute on those roads, he does have taste. He knows that if a bawdy-house floozy has a large knot on the side of her head from contact with a swiftly exerted monkey wrench to the cranium of a Canuck slut, she is a price catch. This mandible indention is a bade of honor among the native hootch peddlers. He would not only pay her for her wares but also throw in a hearty salmon biscuit sammich with round bacon. They might also ice-skate on the frozen lakes (weather permitting) and rarely, but occasionally he might give her a handshake and a heart-felt “good job”.
Back to the definition… The Manitoba Monkey Wrench is to the Maple Leaf Madam as a hickey from Kenickie is to Rizzo. It’s not only something to cherish but to be worn with pride.
The Kicker: As with everything, sometimes the giver of the Manitoba Monkey Wrench can go overboard and hit the harlot too hard, those rendering her oral sexual skills as a thing of the past. Once this happens, the harlot becomes a short-order cook and invariably becomes a victim of Meth use.
Thirdly: If you’re lucky enough to encounter a lady of the night that is not only skilled in the arts of crushing her own pride but also knows how what the difference between a neutral-zone trap and a one-man fore check then by all means brand the woman as a madam worthy of Manitoba’s highest honor.
Now might be a good time for an illustrative story. Once there was a logger that frequented the long and lonesome roads between Winnipeg and Dauphin. While he has no doubt dipped his quill into the ink of every truck stop, rest stop and out-house prostitute on those roads, he does have taste. He knows that if a bawdy-house floozy has a large knot on the side of her head from contact with a swiftly exerted monkey wrench to the cranium of a Canuck slut, she is a price catch. This mandible indention is a bade of honor among the native hootch peddlers. He would not only pay her for her wares but also throw in a hearty salmon biscuit sammich with round bacon. They might also ice-skate on the frozen lakes (weather permitting) and rarely, but occasionally he might give her a handshake and a heart-felt “good job”.
Back to the definition… The Manitoba Monkey Wrench is to the Maple Leaf Madam as a hickey from Kenickie is to Rizzo. It’s not only something to cherish but to be worn with pride.
The Kicker: As with everything, sometimes the giver of the Manitoba Monkey Wrench can go overboard and hit the harlot too hard, those rendering her oral sexual skills as a thing of the past. Once this happens, the harlot becomes a short-order cook and invariably becomes a victim of Meth use.
Thirdly: If you’re lucky enough to encounter a lady of the night that is not only skilled in the arts of crushing her own pride but also knows how what the difference between a neutral-zone trap and a one-man fore check then by all means brand the woman as a madam worthy of Manitoba’s highest honor.
When Pierre saw Delorise turn around with a mouth full of Round Bacon, he could see the mark of the Manitoba Monkey Wrench and knew that this woman was worth more than an expired Trojan, she was worth a sporty stint of ice skating and some wool socks. For he had heard about the Manitoban mark of beauty but had never gazed upon its call with his natural eyes.
by BabySealClubSamich December 1, 2007
Get the Manitoba Monkey Wrench mug.by Maggie Pollack January 8, 2010
Get the manitexto mug.furniture unique to man before he has a significant other. aka, bachelor furniture, worn in, old, etc.
"You need to get rid of Jordan's old beat up, 80's style, fart smelling, cigarette burnt maniture before you move in with him."
by nagemnatsirk November 15, 2011
Get the Maniture mug.It is a canadian sex act where milking girl is on all fours, with her breasts hanging in free air, then they are milked like a cow, with occasionally giving her nipple crunch, and some light punches in the breasts. To make it more interesting usually a man also does the girl in her ass in doggie style during this.
When she said she had delivered baby just a few months ago, the gang got excited to do Manitoba milk bag with her
by Killer Gunshot November 28, 2010
Get the Manitoba Milk Bag mug.by Cass3 August 18, 2005
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