Masturbation

The activity of mastering how to bait a fish. /s

Jim: Hey Johnny, I'm going to the lake to masturbate, care to join me?
Johnny: Hell yeah Him, let's go masturbate together.
Jim: Great! Can't wait to get better with my masturbation!

by The Takahashi Brothers August 27, 2021

Canadian Masturbate

The act of freezing ones foreskin to the point it snaps and cracks when one gets an erection.

"Don't pick a fight with me, or I'll Canadian Masturbate all over you!"

by Nacho Gomez October 9, 2024

Mosquito Hairy Masturbation

A mosquito with very hairy private parts wanks to pictures of mosquito boobies.

Mhm Gurl. = Mosquito Hairy Masturbation | Growing Unlimited Red Lust

by juddily November 24, 2024

Amish Masturbate

To "Amish Masturbate" is to masturbate without the assistance of any modern technological advancements.
This means no screens, no porno, no vibrators, and no masturbatory aid of any kind.

Man, I've been watching too much porn lately. I think I'm going to exclusively Amish masturbate for a while.

by Epileptic Squirrel Rapist December 7, 2024

Canadian Masturbation

Masturbation but Canadian, much like Balkan rage.

Guy 1: "Yo Eric just did Canadian Masturbation!!!"
Guy 2: "Oh yeah, he's from Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, right?"
Guy 3: "That's why its Canadian masturbation and not normal masturbation!"

by Jonathan Werd December 23, 2024

Ethical masturbation

Ethical masturbation does NOT refer to a literal act of masturbation performed ethically, rather, it refers to an act of self loathing and self deprecation done with the goal to ease one's mind, it is often done as follows (conversation example):

Ethical masturbator: oh no, big bad me did a big bad thing
a normal person: maybe do something about it, then?
Ethical masturbator: no, I will just sit here and talk myself down so that I feel like I have been true to myself and so I won't feel guilty about something-bad-that-I-did/something-bad-that-just-happened-on-it's-own even despite the fact that I did nothing to fix it.

another form of Ethical masturbation is doing the same exact thing but rather than just indulging in self-loathing, one might also start asking supernatural entities (gods, spirits, ETC) for forgiveness

just saying that you are bad won't fix things, it's not remorse - it's Ethical masturbation

by Leo of the Харків December 28, 2024

masturbation

''Sometimes, uh, people are unable to find other people to partake in certain activities with, in which they will partake in those activities on their own. That, that is the definition-

(H: no it's really not.)

That is KIND OF the definition of masturbation. Ummm and that is all I'm willing to say''

Max (and Harvey) to Tilly in 13 again podcast

''It looks like you're masturbating.'' was said to Tilly. ''What is masturbation?'' clueless Tilly asked.

by hereforthefunsies January 3, 2025