whaleslayer

A badass hand forged bottle opener.

That whaleslayer ripped through that wax like hot butter.

by The WhaleSlayer June 13, 2018

Whale pussy

A woman who is so fat her pussy is the size of a whale’s

Dude I heard she’s so fat that she has whale pussy

by TheRealTHCdaddyO December 7, 2018

whale

your mum

person 1: your mum is a whale
person 2: fuck you

by man like big c May 1, 2022

jail-whale

An underage person who is overweight; portmanteau of jailbait and whale. Jail-whales may or may not come equipped with a whale tail.

"This girl I met on myspace sounds really cute but she's probably a jail-whale so I'm gonna steer clear."

by Ailurus January 21, 2010

making whale noises on the big white phone

The act of taking a massive poop on the toilet (the big white phone). So massive that your grunts sound like the noises a whale makes out at sea.

Man, I was so stuffed from that meal, that I just got done making whale noises on the big white phone.

by JV Biff July 19, 2010

Beached Whale Status

The moment in which you now no longer resemble a human being but look more like a beached whale ready to take its eternal rest. protocal requires you to update you facebook status to read "beached whale status", but chances are your not gonna get it up there.

**You are now at the point of no return, you will not move for the rest of the night unless there is an emergency**

idiot: yo hand me my phone

You: dude i cant im beached whale status right now

by Mr.DirkAsFuck March 5, 2011

smashed whale shit

1) An analog used in comparison to the physical appearance of one’s wife after a period of domestic toil. Possibly made in an attempt at sympathy --by an idiot.

Mr. Johnson: "Hi hon, what’s for supper? Have you seen my USB beer opener? Whoa! Honey! You look like a bag of freshly smashed whale shit."

Mrs. Johnson: “Go fuck your hat Randy; I’m sleeping with your little brother!”

by Naldistimo Von Mallen November 7, 2011