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Mosquito Hairy Masturbation

A mosquito with very hairy private parts wanks to pictures of mosquito boobies.
Mhm Gurl. = Mosquito Hairy Masturbation | Growing Unlimited Red Lust
by juddily November 24, 2024
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Amish Masturbate

To "Amish Masturbate" is to masturbate without the assistance of any modern technological advancements.
This means no screens, no porno, no vibrators, and no masturbatory aid of any kind.
Man, I've been watching too much porn lately. I think I'm going to exclusively Amish masturbate for a while.
by Epileptic Squirrel Rapist December 7, 2024
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Canadian Masturbation

Guy 1: "Yo Eric just did Canadian Masturbation!!!"
Guy 2: "Oh yeah, he's from Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, right?"
Guy 3: "That's why its Canadian masturbation and not normal masturbation!"
by Jonathan Werd December 23, 2024
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Ethical masturbation

Ethical masturbation does NOT refer to a literal act of masturbation performed ethically, rather, it refers to an act of self loathing and self deprecation done with the goal to ease one's mind, it is often done as follows (conversation example):

Ethical masturbator: oh no, big bad me did a big bad thing
a normal person: maybe do something about it, then?
Ethical masturbator: no, I will just sit here and talk myself down so that I feel like I have been true to myself and so I won't feel guilty about something-bad-that-I-did/something-bad-that-just-happened-on-it's-own even despite the fact that I did nothing to fix it.

another form of Ethical masturbation is doing the same exact thing but rather than just indulging in self-loathing, one might also start asking supernatural entities (gods, spirits, ETC) for forgiveness
just saying that you are bad won't fix things, it's not remorse - it's Ethical masturbation
by Leo of the Харків December 28, 2024
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masturbation

''Sometimes, uh, people are unable to find other people to partake in certain activities with, in which they will partake in those activities on their own. That, that is the definition-

(H: no it's really not.)

That is KIND OF the definition of masturbation. Ummm and that is all I'm willing to say''

Max (and Harvey) to Tilly in 13 again podcast
''It looks like you're masturbating.'' was said to Tilly. ''What is masturbation?'' clueless Tilly asked.
by hereforthefunsies January 3, 2025
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Third person masturbating

To pleasure oneself in a mirror to a picture of oneself.
I walked into the bathroom to see Chad watching himself in the mirror jerking off to a picture of himself.. he was third person masturbating
by Professional ego striker January 4, 2025
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Jamaican masturbation technique number 9

When someone inserts a pipette into the penis hole, and starts the release water in the penis. And starts jerking it. When they finish the water splashes out inside the cum and you start eating it for good luck. People may also use jumpercables to stimulate pleasure while doing Jamaican masturbation technique number 9
Yo Vincent stop doing Jamaican masturbation technique number 9 at my house
by Bleacher brah January 13, 2025
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