Skip to main content

West Greene Wanker

West Greene Wanker is an intellectual prophet of goonings past. He graced the presence of West Greene Highschool, a small highschool located in East Tennessee. He remains a legend among the future disciples that attend the school. He goes by many a name including but not limited to:

West Greene Wanker, Bleacher Beater, Buffalo Beater, Bay Harbor Beater, Junior Jerker, Schooltime Stroker, Education Edger, and finally Chicken Choker. The UNEDGEucated authorities restrained his balls turning them bright blue and carting him off to ABIC for 5 whole business days(allegedly). The prophecy states that if he returns to West Greene then all shall bow and golf clap in his presence. The masturbation Messiah will return.
by Goonciple September 8, 2025
mugGet the West Greene Wanker mug.

The West Greene Wanker

The Legend of the West Greene Wanker

In the shadowed corridors of West Greene High, hidden in the hills of East Tennessee. one name lingers: the West Greene Wanker. A visionary of chaos and charisma, he roamed the bleachers and bathrooms where not but a few knew his name till that fabled day.

To the faculty, he was a disruption. To the students, a prophet. His titles were many, bestowed by those who witnessed his antics with awe and confusion: Bleacher Beater, Enrichment Edger, Gymnasium Gooner, and the ever-infamous Junior Jerker. No one knows what sparked the sudden urge of goonery that day, what mysterious force beheld upon him to unleash chaos right then and there.

His behavior defied explanation. The unedgeucated saw chaos, the enlightened saw performance art. The administration, lacking the Intelligence to decode his gospel of goonery, responded with drastic force. Confirmed by school officials, he was suspended for five days. The ABIC placement was pure fiction, spread by goonsciples hungry for myth, Though the official record shows just a five-day suspension, we the Goonsciples hold firm to the prophecy: he will not walk those halls again. His path now leads to the sacred solitude of homeschooling, where his goonery can ferment unbound.

It is said that if he returns, the lockers will rattle, the claps will rise, and the spirit of goonery will be reborn. Until then, his absence felt like a missing page in the yearbook.
When we needed him most the The West Greene Wanker was gone, leaving only echoes of chaos and his despair, and goonery gone

By Goonciple IV, September 10, 2025
by Goonsiple IV September 10, 2025
mugGet the The West Greene Wanker mug.

Clanker Wanker

slang, derogatory
Pronunciation: /ˈklæŋ.kərˌwæŋ.kər/

1. A dismissive term for a person who habitually relies on AI (chatGPT or similar tools) for tasks, answers, or ideas, often to the point of being incapable of living without them.

2. More broadly, someone perceived as unable or unwilling to think independently, instead outsourcing all thought to an AI.

3. Autocorrect for the brain.

Usage note: Primarily humorous or mocking; may be offensive if used seriously. Please use with caution, the word is meant to encourage the use of independent thinking.
Example: “Bro's such a clanker wanker he asks chatgpt how to do the doo

doo (slang): noun, informal term for taking a dump.
by Pican September 16, 2025
mugGet the Clanker Wanker mug.

Wanker

A word to describe an idiot or annoying person an inefficient person

A person that wants too much
Wanker
by Hiyalolasr January 23, 2025
mugGet the Wanker mug.

Wankers shortbread

A tradition where, upon a young lad’s awkward yet triumphant first solo adventure, his parents—presumably both proud and horrified—present him with a ceremonial piece of shortbread to mark his transition into a deeply confusing stage of life.

In the north of England this shortbread is often accompanied by some of the fathers custard.
Father : Here you go son, have a munch on this wankers shortbread.
Son: thanks dad I really love it
by Poppyseed Monkey January 28, 2025
mugGet the Wankers shortbread mug.

Jolly Wanker

An individual with a great desire and intention to "wank"(A slang term for masturbation). They perform the act with such ferocity and excitement that they could be described as "jolly".
Martin is such a jolly wanker.
by BigBootyBerilium March 14, 2025
mugGet the Jolly Wanker mug.

Anchor Wanker

A term used to define a sea cadet in UK
Air cadet: "look at that anchor wanker!"
Army cadet: "how could you want to be one of those?"
by Shing9778 June 11, 2024
mugGet the Anchor Wanker mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email